That first kiss enveloped me,
Made me feel as though I had never been kissed
that this was my first.
I saw fireworks as I dug my nails in
moaning as your tongue caressed mine.
Giving over to you
all the fear and pain that I have ever felt.
That first kiss,
made me ashamed
for never before had I felt like this
never before had I loved like this.
That first kiss was everything that I could have wished for
it kept all the promises you spoke to me
it gave me so much more,
that first kiss……
it is how we start.
I get an hour for lunch every shift. I have to take an hour for lunch or 2 1/2 hours no matter what. I cannot work through my lunch because we are busy and I have work to do and than leave 1/2 hour early. So I do. And I live 5-7 minutes from the store. I have begun to come home for my lunches.
Many would be surprised to learn that I make myself a light lunch. I plug in my phone if it needs to charge and sit myself down in front of the computer. I check my email. I play games on Facebook. I listen to the silence. It is a wonderful thing. I do not answer my phone in this 50 minutes of free time. I think. And I ponder and lately I have been creating.
By nature I am a rather gregarious person. By career, I am a constant talker. Not a stalker although if you pique my interest I might peek around that corner of the aisle just to see what you buy. I talk for 40+ hours a week. Never mind when I run into someone outside of work. Dear lord you would never know that silence is something that I crave.
My brain overloads badly when there is too much noise. When I have no time to breath and everything needs to be completed but oh my god there are line ups! As you can tell I was a little short staffed today. I talk. And talk. And talk and everyone leaves a little bit happier and I am happy too. I made someone smile.
When I come home for my hour lunch it is to regroup. To calm my brain so that we can do the next 2 1/2 hours without my swearing at someone out loud. I will get everything done that I have to. While I do, a small portion of my brain is working on a poem I started this morning. Imagery is of a crazed clown. Not sure where that is coming from but I am going to run with it.
My silence is about to come to an end. Thus I must head back to work. I take a deep breath, grab my phone and out the door I go. I’ll be back because well the crazed clown wants to get loose.
Engage the mind before the body;
and her soul will be yours;
Once I thought that I knew what love was
warm sugary feelings
Wrapped around me like grandma’s blanket.
But that is not love.
arguing yet still accepting one another.
never seeing one another but know you are there
the ability to see passed your faults and moving forward.
It is not a wonder that love has passed on by
for I dream of a love found in books and fairy tales
Not the love that is really extended.
So I shall say so long and farewell
For I can no longer keep up this fantasy.
When tomorrow comes so does the rage
the time I spent building
I huddle within myself
trying to come together.
I lost so much time, not being me
but being the mannequin you desired
Smart and cute I cannot maintain the facade
but allow it to fall and shatter.
What made me think I could play?
What made me think that I could endure?
Sick and silly love, that is what it does
turns you from the hero to the child that snivels on the floor.
On the morrow when my heart is breaking
when the tears are filling mine eyes
I will seek for thee
I will watch with wonder as once more
our love does grow so wild
I will watch with agony as we come undone
bitter in such defeat.
Once upon a time came to us
once upon a time we failed
Once upon a time winter’s snow did creep
and the blackness enthralled.