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He was everyone’s best friend

yet a horrid husband and father.

Demons cried, piercing his pain

until alcohol was the only game.

Destroyed two lives;

thought it was a game,

died before retribution could be handed down.

He cared for others but not his own flesh and blood

demanding that we love.

Damned to the Underworld,

demons gobble his pain.

I can hear your cries, your pleads for help

but all I can feel is my pain.

 

©Jay-lyn Doerksen

July 31/17

 

Depression

Three years ago around this time I crashed hard. I was so depressed, so sad all the time. I had no will nor desire to do anything. I could not even mother my son. All I did was sleep and cry. Thank goodness for a doctor who is understanding and aware.

When I look back on that person I have no idea who she is. That is/was not the truth of me. But for so long I had pretended I was alright. Life was good. And in doing so I forgot who I was.

*****You know the feeling when your brain is wide awake but your eyes are so heavy because you have cried enough tears to refill all the oceans twice over? The depleted energy, the disappointment that you couldn’t even make it through one day, that thick wet grey sweater hanging from your frame…..that is depression.