Sadness

Woke up sad again today. Tears falling. A general sense of lethargy. I am forcing myself to do my exercises even though I am really not in a mood.
When you tell people you are sad most, at least 90% in my experience, mitigate how you feel. There is a full moon. Oh you just need to get out more. Oh yeah so and so feels like that too you should talk to them. So I am going to chose very carefully who I tell.
Also, I have no energy to give to anyone but myself. I am not able to prop you up, hold your hand and be a cheerleader for you. I need to focus that energy on myself. To getting more well so I can go back to my regular day to day living.
When I sit, tears streaming down my face do not assume that I can be made to stop it you offer me chocolate or coffee. I may not even want or be able to talk but listening to you talk to me like I am a child is also not going to do anything for me.
I do not know why I am feeling sad. I do not know why I sit here crying. What I do know is I am exhausted of being there for everyone else and feeling like no one is there for me.
PS: Usually this would be when I would turn to pills to help me to cope with how I am feeling. I do not nor do I have the desire to dull this. I am letting the sadness wash over me and the tears fall. And I will come out stronger for having done so.

Author: Jay-lyn Doerksen

A single hard working mom of a soon to be teenage son. A poet and story teller I have wanted to write since I was a child. This space is where I share stories about myself and my life and the creative poetry that stirs my soul. My hope is you will pull up a chair and a cup of coffee delving into the world that I offer and you find simple enjoyment for a few moments. Welcome to The Wonderful & Wacky World of One Single Mom

One thought on “Sadness”

  1. Unable to post on the site…a new thing to learn.

    I just wanted to say I hope you realize and validate the circle who are there for you. You said you had a good resource so am hoping you don’t always feel like no-one is there for you.

    I love you and am pulling for you so never forget that.

    Good news on your insurance.

    Love and hugs mom😍

    Sharon
    Tu amiga de Chicxulub

    ________________________________

    Liked by 1 person

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