Every Time

Every time I think I am free
assailed by memories
your smile
your kiss
your touch
tears simmer
unshed beneath my lashes.
I tell myself
to not be a fool
that my worth
my desires
my needs
are important
not to be trifled with
and yet…..
when I smell your smell
when out of the corner of my eye
do I spy you waiting
when I realize there will be no more…..
stimulating conversations
where I learn new ideas
new concepts
my eyes are opened to a different way.
There will be no more dinners
or breakfasts shared
beneath full moon
and rising sun.
I turn the radio off
when that song comes on
so as to minimize the hurt.
Every time I think I am free
something about you
will always pull me back.
December 12/18
Photo is one of my own taken Summer of 2017