Hard for me
this lack of content
our conversations dulled
do you miss me 
as I miss you
or do you laugh at me now?
I know you can be cruel.
I know you can be faith.
I know….
what do I know?
that I want this fight.
I meander forward 
shambling along
lost in 
in reality 
that burns 
that fires
that singes my heart.
Silly woman
don’t you see
game you are
game you will always be.
I should have…. 
I did know better
but you lulled my sensibilities.
you took my heart.
A heart that I have kept close
you broke open.
Picked the lock 
opened me 
you walked away.
Fell away
what did I do?
One moment
we were in synch
the next
so far apart.
I live.
I learn.
I love.
This is who I am.
Finally I have realized
it is not I 
who is damaged.
It is not I
who did not do enough.
It is not I….
yes it is….
commitment I want
love you still
I do.
December 15/18

Author: Jay-lyn Doerksen

A single hard working mom of a soon to be teenage son. A poet and story teller I have wanted to write since I was a child. This space is where I share stories about myself and my life and the creative poetry that stirs my soul. My hope is you will pull up a chair and a cup of coffee delving into the world that I offer and you find simple enjoyment for a few moments. Welcome to The Wonderful & Wacky World of One Single Mom

2 thoughts on “Still”

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