Sweet Serenity

Floating through my mind
half forgotten melody
childhood memory
I close my eyes
I breath in deep
listening to that song.
When first did I hear it?
this lull-a-bye?
Soothing my fears
chasing away my anxiety
wrapping me in the warmth of love.
I sit
knees drawn 
tears tracking my cheeks
working so hard
to not be
silly
ugly
desperate
I really do miss you.
Late at night
I awaken
lacking the warmth of your body
next to mine.
I startle from nightmares.
I wake
hour after hour
missing your arms
missing your touch
pillow sodden with tears.
I long for you
yearn
desire your truth.
Hero
villain
not sure which role to play.
I love you
what more should I say?
Could I say?
I wanted….
fairy tale love
swept off my feet
sparks between our eyes.
Sweet serenity
lull-a-bye
soothing my soul
my heartache
bringing me to balance once more.
December 19/18

Secret Games

Within the shadows
skittering through dreams
a little girl
has to play dead.
Wondering 
if another will come
or 
was her daddy the last one?
Men 
abused 
debased
harmed 
broke her tiny soul
with smiles on their faces
blackness in their souls.
She wished them dead
gone
murdered
sliced apart.
No recourse came her way
dreams 
all she had
to sustain.
These men
secretive of their special club
knew 
should the girl ever escape
death
would become
a thunderous roar
hell
a reality
they would have to face.
 
December 19/18
Photo by Volkan Olmez on Unsplash