Ignore

Dreams of you……
I rose with tears in my eyes
pillow soaked 
for images I was sure I had buried
are raging through my head.
I want to be so angry.
I want to scream
rail
storm
revile you to all I know
but I cannot.
I want to hide.
Memories
strong 
good
us together
dance passed.
Cowering behind the door
hiding from the monsters of our past
I cannot go on.
I cannot….. 
I cannot…..
I cannot…..
Summer’s sweet blush
a love once true
that could have been us.
Heart wrecked
shredded 
torn
destroyed 
in one callous act.
Today I wish I could say goodbye.
Instead 
a physical ache
grips my body tight
wracking me
shattering my bones
while I scream at the night.
Everyone wonders
why I cannot let go
why I still love you so.
How do I explain
that you relit the passion
that had been missing from my life?
I miss your arms.
I have forgotten the taste of your lips.
When next you see me
gaze upon me fondly
quietly ignoring the tears.
January 14/19
Photo by Meghan Holmes on Unsplash