Powerless No More

We sat beneath summer skies
relaxed
when you began to spin.
I was not open enough.
I only gave hints
otherwise
I hid it all away.
My past is ugly
my scars
braided across my wrist
soul hammered
beaten
cross to bear
but you promised.
‘Talk to me.
Tell me true.
I swear to you…..
I will not leave…..
I will not let you down
like others before me.
I opened up
telling you the horrors
the fears
the pain
how everyone always walk away.
You vowed you were not the same.
I was a fool.
I believed your pretty words.
I should have known…..
When it sounds too good to be true…..
it is too good to be true.
You duped me.
You pulled me in.
You are a fucking ass.
Yet under my skin
you remain
an ache that won’t subside.
Some days I still love you.
Other days I hate.
Satin tears
drowning my cheeks
you call me a fool
a puppy
a sulking bitch
how could I do this to you?
How could I do what?
Feel?
Open?
Believe the words you have spoken?
Shred my heart
stomp on my reserves
this baby girl
is no longer on her knees.
I am taking my power back.
January 19/19
Photo by Josh Rocklage on Unsplash

Author: Jay-lyn Doerksen

I am a single hard working mom in her 40's. I have always written poetry and I love words. I live with depression and its ups downs. This is a space where I can create and write all that I need to.

22 thoughts on “Powerless No More”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.