Learning to Live

Tears
cold
desperate
trace a route
over gaunted cheeks
blooded lips
as I stare in the window
picture a scene
of warmth
of love
one I have been left out of.
I thought…..
silly woman that I am…..
feelings ran true
through you
only to discover that the lies you spoke
broken promises made
a habit of which you cannot be broke.
Silken words
wrapped like ribbons around my heart
tugging
pulling
opening me up
to pain
to dismay
to disgust with myself.
Watching
sadness
your attempt to appease your guilt
drink away
smoke away
you know
in your heart
that you have done me wrong.
Even were you to whisper I am sorry
were you to gather me in your arms
coming back
no longer an option.
I have learned to live without you.
March 1/19