Blackened Husk

***At first I thought that this was going to become positive. It has not. This is not at all how I feel now. It is a recollection of how I felt in the days leading up to my big KABOOM! 4 more days***
Pallid specter
grey
anguished features
pain
unbidden
unwanted
would give anything for it to go away.
Discomfort…..
what all feel 
when I am present.
Lost
scarecrow straight
stride forward
look neither right
nor left
acknowledge nothing
so much safer this way.
Disquieted…..
easier to pretend
than to actually see
this…..
is what life has done to me.
No longer looking in the mirror
escape the penetrating look
disappointment
that I have not lived up
to the expectations
I force upon myself.
Malaise…..
bites deep
look away
hide away
draw knees in
protect yourself
no one else will.
Time has expired 
leaving me void
my reality
my truth
I hate to say it
but there is no moving forward.
©Dec. 19/19
Picture via Pinterest

Author: Jay-lyn Doerksen

A single hard working mom of a soon to be teenage son. A poet and story teller I have wanted to write since I was a child. This space is where I share stories about myself and my life and the creative poetry that stirs my soul. My hope is you will pull up a chair and a cup of coffee delving into the world that I offer and you find simple enjoyment for a few moments. Welcome to The Wonderful & Wacky World of One Single Mom

47 thoughts on “Blackened Husk”

  2. The woman you were in this poem versus the woman you are today, the difference is immense. I am so glad I can see the journey up and out and not the journey down and under. You are awesome missus! Your words touched my heart again. Well written and thought provoking as usual. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

      1. To be honest, I feel like I am learning who you are through your poetry, you have a beautiful soul and it shows in the way you use the flow of words to express your deepest fears and your greatest joys. I am not normally given to commenting on blogs etc but I always feel the need to when I read your work. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Thank you Gemma. I hope I am spelling your name correctly. I still surprise myself every time I write. That I put those words together. Sometimes when I read my own work I wonder how the heck I wrote it. I have on more than one occasion read a piece of work and thought wow this is good who wrote this I want to read more. Only to discover that it is me. Sorry babbly. Now having said that let me also say I read each and every one of your entries. I may not comment but I am lurking there. 🤓💜

        Liked by 1 person

      3. I know exactly what you mean about surprising yourself every time you write. In my normal day to day life, when I have time, I write stage play scripts and short stories. When I read those back I laugh at myself because I had no idea I even had those stories in me and I am always surprised at how well they turn out! Thank you for reading my entries sweetie, I know they are not for the faint hearted so I really do appreciate that comment more than you know, and yes you spelt my name correctly 😀

        Liked by 1 person

  4. You were my top commenter on my poetry blog….. you were the first to like and comment every morning there for a while…. not no good no more?

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

      11. No….. Sherman is Mr Peabody’s boy. Mr Peabody is a dog with a time machine.

        Did you never watch Bullwinkle and Rocky?

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

Gravatar
WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Cancel

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

coolpeppermint

memories and musings

The Hermit Poet's Ramblings

Poetry BLOG By Edge of Humanity Magazine

Scribbles 'n Bits

sjbutlerphotography.wordpress.com/

Nature Photography & Fine Art, card & print making

utahan15

poetry and prose

THE PRODIGY OF IDEAS

This blog is a part of my inner world. Be careful to walk inside it.

Trust Me, You’re Not Alone

Being a Mother, an ex. Wife, and the best I can be

mydangblog

Come for the laughs, stay for the lunacy

Here

Nowhere else

Ανθολογία-Anthology-Anthologie

Γιάννης Πιταροκοίλης: Παρουσίαση του συγγραφικού μου έργου (My personal writing/Mes œuvres littéraires

Here's A Thing...

Edge of Humanity Magazine

Village Princess💕

I write what I dream

Eloquently Whole

soft and powerful

OverFiftyandFreeWomanBlog

Life, work, kids, sex, BDSM and anything else

Ailish Sinclair

Stories and photos from Scotland

Ravenful Post

Designed By Creativity

The Alchemist's Studio

Raku pottery, vases, and gifts

Pensieri Parole e Poesie

Sono una donna libera. Nel mio blog farete un viaggio lungo e profondo nei pensieri della mente del cuore e dell anima.

Rachel Katy Martin

%d bloggers like this: