Bleak Moored

Once

(pause, sigh)

I would have felt

drowning

sucked

drawn beneath burgeoning waters

breath held

lungs filled

eyes limpid

sightless

drugs

alcohol

vacuum inside

no where to run

no where to hide.

That once

was my life.

Sea of emotions

swamped

overwhelmed

high

low

no in between

no peace

no serenity

manic laughter

sawing at nerves

reverberates

through tired mind

just want to lie down

just want to let go

just want…..

Strength in spades

I have

powerless

paralyzed with fear

broken

breaking

no longer able to hold

finger tips bleeding

clutching

broken ledge

eating into

poisoned skin

painted cherry smile

even as mouth trembles

down turned.

Fraud

fake

failure

screaming through my mind

turn away from mirrored eyes

pushing down nightmared dreams

pretending

life has meaning.

©Nov. 26/20

Picture is my own