Are Manners Archaic?

Yesterday proved to me once more why I dislike working on Saturdays.
Saturday brings out all the rude ones.
Saturday brings out all the entitled ones.
Saturday brings out all the ones who need to be told to step back.
My early morning customers were in general the same ones that I had four weeks ago.
How do I know this you ask?
Because two weeks ago I worked the horrid 8:30-5 on Saturday.
Which totally ruined my weekend.
Except that I worked Sunday too and did get a three day weekend out of it.
It is more a marker.
Some wanted to talk.
Some did not.
I am a fairly decent read of people I think so I know when I can chatter and when I just need to do my job.
My first indication that people were not going to be game players was when I had to tell three customers to back up.
Not from me but from the person in front of them.
6 feet people.
We even have markers on the floor to stand on.
It is not rocket science.
Next up was the woman who was shopping with her two daughters.
As she is bagging away she demanded to know if we ever bagged for people.
And I indicated yes we did.
Me: For seniors we help out.
Customer (snarling): But not for moms shopping with kids?
Me: (thinking of my moms that come through with three kids and a newborn and no help:
No ma’am we don’t.
Customer: So you only bag in your own bags.
Me: Yes if you purchase bags I can bag for you.
Customer:  I am going back to shop at Superstore. It is cheaper there. And I am not hurrying.
Me: Ma’am no one is in a hurry it is Saturday. And no one is forcing you to.
Me (as she walks away): Have a fabulous weekend ma’am.
Customer (bitterly): I’ll try.
You’ll try?
Make it a good day.
You have the power.
Next up the gentleman comes through my till and asks for paper bags.
Paper bags can only hold a certain amount and I know how to pack them.
I had packed two and set them on the counter and began bagging the third bag.
As I scanned items and put them in bag he reached across the counter into the bag and removed the item and put in the bags I had already packed.
Me (after the third time): Would you like to pack your own groceries.
Customer: No I am making them heavy as I like them.
Me: Well you can bag them yourself and our bags do not hold that well.
Customer (reaching across and taking items out): I know how much I can put in there.
Me (exasperated as he reaches in again): If you do not like the way that I am bagging you can bag yourself.
Customer: I can shop somewhere else.
Me making eye contact and not saying anything.
Customer: I do not appreciate this. Next time I will be going to a different cashier.
Me (in my head heavy on the sarcasm): Oh no please don’t go to another cashier you wound me. (Dramatic arm toss and fall to the floor as though shot through the heart by his barb)
Me: Thank you have a good day.
Watched him walk over to CS and complain about me.
I really don’t care.
And guess what customer man?
You are now on the Cashier Hit List.
I feel sorry for you.
All of this leads to today and no one saying excuse me.
I say excuse me all the time.
When I am passing someone in the aisle.
When I am reaching for something.
When I interrupt a conversation.
I was taught to say excuse me to be polite.
And yet I am watching society become more and more impolite as time goes on.
I went to leave home to go for my massage.
I was boxed in my a vehicle to the right and to the left of me.
And there was a vehicle parked right behind me.
And the vehicle behind me parked there yesterday.
As I was leaving for work.
I am working hard to instill the ‘excuse me/pardon me’ response in T.
He is hit and miss.
But at least I am working on it.
If half the people I see are any indication then polite society is soon going to be unmannered and rude.
Which is a pity.
A little more care of attitude might make the world a slightly kinder place.
PS: Going to say I am not always polite.
        I am not always even nice.
        I work on it like I work on everything else.
©April 25/21
Picture is my own taken via Messenger App

Author: Jay-lyn Doerksen

A single hard working mom of a soon to be teenage son. A poet and story teller I have wanted to write since I was a child. This space is where I share stories about myself and my life and the creative poetry that stirs my soul. My hope is you will pull up a chair and a cup of coffee delving into the world that I offer and you find simple enjoyment for a few moments. Welcome to The Wonderful & Wacky World of One Single Mom

7 thoughts on “Are Manners Archaic?”

  1. Hope today is a better one! Sorry to hear about the angry customers and their snarly comments. It’s hard to be pleasant in those situations. And after an interaction like that, it’s hard to be nice to others.
    It’s great you are teaching the importance of manners to T! With kids it’s hard to see the results of our labors until way later…I mean, way later. But keep at it; it’s for a worthy goal to raise polite persons.
    Have a great weekend! Hugs…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Customer service jobs can suck. I’m sorry Jay. But I don’t think society is becoming more rude. I really don’t. I think there is a balance in the world. I see people be very generous and much more sensitive to each other. I have gotten in the habit of not expecting or saying excuse me as much because we all have to navigate this world together and be in each other’s spaces and I am all for people needing to o do what they have to do, but Ben invading my personal space. At the point I need someone to move or will be close enough to touch then I do say something. But I don’t expect anyone to say anything. It’s like holding the door open for people. It used to make me so mad if they didn’t say thank you and now I don’t even care anymore. I still do it because it’s the right thing to do and I want to. But to expect people to comply to my rules just seemed silly. Especially when I was the one getting mad and they were completely oblivious to it all. Made no sense to me. Lol

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It was how I was raised and I am seeing more and more the ‘Me Only’ attitude. And yes we have to navigate our world and those around us but please thank you pardon me/excuse me are the little things that make the world go ’round a little easier. The fact we are seeing so many people believe it is ok to use violence and harsh words/attitudes such as that lovely asshole Tucker and it is ok. Not in my world. And the fact that society as a whole is finding this normal and ok disgusts me. We reap what we put out into the world and right now I am seeing nothing much but a vast ugliness running deep through the fabric of humanity and it is scary.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Take it easy. Times are tough. Why do you think people in war torn countries don’t smile. Because life is hard.

        Don’t take it hard or personal. Things may swing back around. It’s not the worst thing. Right?

        Liked by 2 people

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: