Black and White

That is how I use to view things. Was only suppose to be done a certain way do it that way. I tended to follow policy a lot because then I was not in the wrong.

Even in life I was pretty hard core on the black and white. I just knew I was right. That there could be no other way. Strident in my beliefs and assurance that I was in the right. When I have memories come back I cringe at how I behaved.

At 50 I have come to realize there is black and white but also there are wonderful shades of grey. There are things now that I let slide because it is either not worth the fight or I perceive things differently.

It is interesting to me that I am now able to see it while others are unable to view life as anything but black and white. And they are still adamant that it will be done their way come hell or high water.

I now am looking at myself. The other people involved. Is it worth the stress and anger? No.

Is it worth the possibility that I could lose a relationship with someone I love dearly? Big fat no on that one.

We have a situation that is occurring at work with a co-worker. They are being removed from the department they have been working in. The decision was made by the department head and BB. And it has already been offered to another staff member before the first has been spoken to.

Is it shady that they are doing this before the other person knows? And telling people about it? Yes. It absolutely is. This co-worker is walking in blind to something others are aware of. Am I though going to go and tell BB that what he and the department head are doing is wrong? Not in the least.

The crux of it is that this is someone’s department and they have an employee that is not performing to expectations. Who does not move quickly, shows no initiative and is needed to have the same thing explained over and over again. No retention. Shades of grey. It is not just a right and wrong. There is customer service and getting the job done.

K is planning to go and speak to BB about it. Despite her not knowing the whole of the situation she is adamant that what they are doing is wrong and need to be know it. I tried to divert her, because I have a feeling this is going to backfire on her.

Black and white.

All the shades of grey in between.

It took me until I was 50 to understand this concept. I wish that I had realized it earlier, but like all lessons, some are longer in making themselves known.

Just as I am aware that there are not just two sides to the story, there is always so much more. And without understanding the whole of it, we cannot rush to judgement on the behaviour of others.

March 3/23

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