Pull the Trigger

Countless times
the image has played over
over and over
in your cluttered mind.
Silent
with sound
black and white
in color
violence the only stable factor.
Cringing
cowering in fear
waiting for the blows
vicious words
until suddenly you can take no more.
He never thought you meant it
he thought you would crash again
begging for forgiveness
for imagined wrongs in his perfect world.
Tiny
deadly
slipped into your hand
lending you a bravado you did not feel
you leveled the gun at his laughing face
and pulled the trigger.
August 24/15
Photo by Sofia Sforza on Unsplash
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Wonderful Words

epiphany [ih-pif-uh-nee]

a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something, usually initiated by some simple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.

There are also religous connotations to this word, but when I use it I am using in with regards to the above definition.

There are just sometimes when in the conversation a word that is rarely used is required. Saying I just had a realization, when it is about something important, something that maybe you have been hiding from, does not resonate with me the same way I just had an epiphany does.

The reason I have even thought about this and what it means to me, is because I used this exact phrase ‘I had an epiphany’ this week. My co-worker than asked me to explain what it meant. So I did.

Today, in talking with M, I called her a receptacle. As in she is the receptacle for all my ideas and thoughts which I have been forced to bottle up all week because our schedules have not meshed. She thought it was wonderful and weird at the same time.

I love words. I love their meanings. I love how when I am speaking at times epiphany, receptacle or regurgitate will roll off my tongue. Apropos of the moment and time I am in. Words……

 

Nefarious

ne·far·i·ous
nəˈferēəs/
adjective
  1. (typically of an action or activity) wicked or criminal.
    “the nefarious activities of the organized-crime syndicates”

    Last night my best friend left me her house keys and I used them for a neferious purpose. I stole her toilet paper. And than  I realized nefarious needs to be the word of the week. I love how the word nefarious rolls off your tongue, the pictures that it presents. Nefarious. A word I need to use more of.