Happiness is easy

Hey! What is that sound I am hearing? The one that is constantly pouring from my mouth, shaking my body, making my eyes shine? What is that noise I am making? Why can I not stop grinning?

I work with people all day long. I talk and talk and talk and talk. Yet I complain about T when he talks too much. Believe me I totally get the irony of that statement.

Since starting back to work last month, all I have done is Customer Service and cashiering. No responsibility. None. I show up for my shift, I do my work, I come home. I am not grouchy. I am not short tempered with T. I am loving going in no earlier than 9 a.m. So far the latest that I have had to stay until is 8:30 p.m.

Next week I begin working 8 hour days, earliest start time is 9 with the latest at 9:30. Wohooooo! Home no later than 6 p.m. Okay, home at 6:08 if I don’t have to go and pick T up from the sitter’s. Maybe I will make him walk home which of course he would not find very funny.

And the laughing. I laugh almost all the time with most of my customers. There is joking so much so that I have gotten to the point of saying that my comedy is free of charge, a bonus for coming through my till. And I do not have a quiet laugh. I am the girl who laughs with her entire being. I have mentioned that before in previous blogs. Head back, belly laughs. There have been times that I have been close to tears I am laughing so hard.

And the staff I am working with are terrific. I am wondering if I might have been a little scary before and come to think of it,  yeah I was. Anal, everything had to be by the book.  Unable to give up control. And I did not hang out with them while working. I was always doing what a manager does, managing. I do not have to do that now. Manage I mean.

Am I helpful? Yes I am. But I do not have to watch like a hawk and make sure that every little thing is being taken care of. I stand behind my till or bag for other cashiers. Last night I washed tills and made sure to tidy up the front. I did what I could do without stressing or foaming at the mouth because things were not completed before I left work.

I have been given until the end of June (I will have been back to work for 3 months than) to get back on my feet. To make the decision of whether or not I want to continue on in the role of Front End Lead, step down to Supervisor or step all the way down. To full time Customer Service/Cashier. And I have to tell you I am fairly confident that I already know what my answer is going to be.

 

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Descend

Watch as she climbs

up and up she goes

reaching the top

boss of all boss

making sure that on goes the show.

Bending over backwards

friend to all

not seeing as her mind cracks

not ready to fall.

Watch as she spins out of control

a rapid  descent to hell

and when she reaches a hand

searching for those to help

all she finds…..

is a blank wall.

 

Prompt Untitled #3

You strut and you preen

muscles flexed

tight jeans

smiling at all the girls.

Running here and there

loving all the giggles

never realizing

a price will be paid.

Like a peacock

you flaunt your plummege

thinking you are all that

and more.

I smother my laughter

as I watch you dance

because truth be told

you are an ass.

 

 

 

Versatile Blogger Award

I was nominated for the Versatile Blogger Award this evening by the delightful sierraleonegirl  in a weekend of nominations. Thank you so much my girl.

What is the Versatile Blogger Award?

  • The versatile blogger award is given to bloggers by bloggers to as a recognition of the uniqueness of their content and individuality.
  • It is also a way to honor bloggers who bring something special to your life whether everyday or now and then.
  • The award is run by VBA. Check them out

 

  • Rules!

When you are nominated for the Versatile blogger award, you have to play by a number of rules and these are the rules.

  • Thank the person who gave you this award.
  • Include a link to their blog.
  • Next, select 15 blogs/bloggers that you’ve recently discovered or follow regularly
  • Nominate those 15 bloggers for the Versatile Blogger Award — you might include a link to this site.
  • Finally, tell the person who nominated you 7 things about yourself.

 

I an not going to nominate anyone because over the last couple of days I have nominated all that I would have nominated here. I do invite those who would like to to participate as I always love discovering new facts out about y’all. I read your stories but having the deep dark secrets behind the stories is awesome. And I may create a character based on you. The cons of having a writer friend. As y’all know.

Okay 15 things that no one knows about me:

  1. I was pigeon-toed at birth. I had to wear lovely shoes that had a bar going across to keep my feet straight. To this day when I am really tired, my feet will turn inward if they are propped on table or end of couch.
  2. I also had a lazy eye. That was corrected by wearing an eye patch.
  3. I broke my arm after learning how to jump off a swing. Forward jumping. I decided that I would try backwards jumping and well…….
  4. I am a non-practicing Catholic. There are just too many things that I cannot resolve to my satisfaction.
  5. I am a secret romantic. I want to be swept off my feet. Flowers sent to me, dinner at a nice restaurant. Told to dress up.
  6. I am rather opinionated.
  7. I like to talk, a lot.
  8. I swear, a lot. T is forever telling me to watch my language.
  9. I can take little pieces of information and come up with the whole picture. Whether I am suppose to know or not.
  10. My bff and I are twins born 9 3/4 years apart. We look nothing alike, we sound nothing alike, yet we are soul sisters. She knows everything about me. From the moment we get up until we go to bed, we are messaging one another. Or sending voice messages.
  11. I am separated.  And although at first we could not stand one another, the Ex and me, we are at a point where we are friends.
  12. I want to make you cry! LOL I have realized that with my poetry, I want to make people feel. I want to touch a cord within them. Mom use to joke that she always knew how good a book was based on how many times I cried. Or used Kleenex. I want to be able to do that.
  13. I spend a lot of time reading the blogs that I follow. I have mentioned before but will mention this again, I am so afraid to miss any of your posts that I have them emailed to me. Instantly.
  14. I love to cry. As odd as that sounds when I read I love it when the writer can make me cry.  Being able to connect through the words before me, to feel what the writer is trying to convey, means a lot to me. Sometimes I will have to stop reading because the pain is so overwhelming. Yet I will continue to read once the initial wave has passed.
  15. I love to sing. I use Spotify and it is awesome. I can spend an entire weekend writing and listening and never get to the end of my list. And I keep adding to it.
  16. Okay there are only suppose to be 15 things but I just had a thought…..let me know your favorite song. I love to discover new artists.

So there you have it. 15 things about me and 1 request. Have an awesome night/Monday wherever you are in the world. And thank you for reading me.

Maimed

I get lost in fantasy
romance
forgetting
never acknowledging
it is not for me.
I am bespelled
when you speak
sweet words
sugared lies
longing looks
until I am caught
bound within the web you weave.
Once entangled
smiles become tart
words fall like hammers
wounding
gouging my self-esteem
creating this pathetic creature
that you view with scorn.
What is it about me?
Why do you torment me so?
Speaking to my dreams
to my desires
making me fall in love
only to maim my heart when you leave.
©Jay-lyn Doerksen
May 6/18