Universal Comedy

Fail after fail
man after man
heartache after heartache
finally realized it was me
not them
I was the one who needed to change
my expectations
my desires
my needs.
Not looking for the perfect man
one who adores me
that will do just fine
not looking for an adonis
one who supports me
that will make me smile.
Make my heart sing.
Concentrate on self
time has come
wave of hand
all men can disappear
I need to look within
find my peace
then I can begin.
Threw it out to the universe
ain’t no man
coming to my home
come to my throne
until I
as Queen
decree.
Universe took it as a challenge
took it to mean
a prank to be played
upon resistant romantic.
on my head
about to drown
what the hell?
Someone somewhere is enjoying
this comedy of games.
©April 29/2
Picture via Pinterest

War came to Fairy Land

When war came to Fairy Tale land
it was a sight to see
none knew what to do
or
who was against who?
Tooth Fairy was top dog
no longer doing the work
sending out minions to collect teeth
while she sat
eating bonbons
getting very fat.
As everyone knows
the kinder you are to your employees
they will do what you want
when you want 
without question.
(Well some small questions)
Grumbles began to rumble
dissatisfaction
at an all time high
revolution being planned in plain sight
at tavern tables
polishing rotted teeth
building another wing on the Tooth Castle.
There was going to be trouble
this was true
they did not know how to go
or who they should see.
He came flying in on a wonderous carpet
colors of white/pink/blue
sat upon stools in taverns
hastening along the mumbles to grumbles
to outright mutiny.
As everyone knows
once rebellion does begin
once armies begin to amass
there is no turning back.
One General to the other
there will be no suing for peace.
This peculiar war
waged between Tooth Fairy
and
Toilet Paper Fairy
(a new kid on the block)
became one for the books
as teeth arrows flew
toilet paper bombs smashed the line.
When all the dust settled
Tooth Castle knocked down
up went one made solely of
you guessed it…..
toilet paper.
Soon teeth minions were turned
toilet paper carriers they became
where the work did not include
trying to steal the teeth of small children
leaving little in return
except for maybe some bad dreams.
As toilet paper carriers
they were the delight of all kingdom comes
saving more than one bottom
from a nasty plight.
***Toilet Paper Fairy is the fairy who provides you
     tiny scraps of toilet paper when the roll has run out.
©April 28/19
Picture via Pinterest