Lovely Days

The last couple of days have been a mix of frustration and joy.
Being so ticked off I could scream to crying tears of pride.
Today is Friday.
Wednesday morning I got up full of energy.
My ideas for writing were still M.I.A. and still are but I was going to find something to write about.
I hate not writing every day but when nothing flows nothing flows which truthfully makes Jay a bit cranky.
Coffee is made.
Sit down and open the laptop.
Which will not load.
No matter what I did.
Now any sane person after about 20 minutes or so would have given up.
Not me I must perserver.
I need my laptop.
After nearly an hour I finally go in and wake T up.
Last spring when school went into remote learning I bought T a Chromebook to work on.
Plus to go back and forth from my place to his dad’s as I was not going to let him take my laptop for the weekend.
I go in and wake T up to ask him where the Chromebook is and is it charged.
Well mom caught him in a lie.
Chromebook was not charged.
Yet he had been using it to check his school stuff.
Or so he assured me.
Apparently 6 a.m. is the time to ask the questions.
I sit back down and open up the Chromebook and begin the tedious process of having to set things up the way I like them.
Had to download my Evernote program which of course is different for the Chromebook from Windows. 
And not different in a good way. 😠😠😠
I pay for the  Plus subscription but it is not translating on here.
Which means that I am unable to change my font size and style.
Which again causes Jay to be a grouchy pants. 😠😠
That aside I eventually calmed my ass down and got things settled.
Reason why I did not write on Wednesday.
By the time I got home from work I was tired and brain fogged.
I am not sure about anyone else but in the evenings I throw on adult swim or teletoon and zone out.
Read.
Play games on my phone.
More I am finding that I am  playing games.
And messaging with friends.
My evenings.are spent trying to catch up from the day.
Tuesday I fell asleep on the couch.
I had closed my eyes for a second and then T was coming in the door.
Thursday was my day off and I had to go into the city to be fitted for and pay for my new glasses.
Should have them in about a two weeks.
I went with V.
V drove.
She is a horrid backseat driver which I knew which is also why I did not take offence when she said she would drive.
Off we go after getting situated.
I shot off a message to friends telling them that we were heading into the city.
V’s phone dings and she wonders who is texting her.
It was me.wp-16131354176731243388431743166719.png
She had been at the top of the friend list not Papa Bear who I was sending the message to.
We were not even off the drive before we were laughing and almost crying.
Our drive was good.
We talked.
There were somethings V has no one else to talk to about.
But there is me.
Because while I am not the smartest cookie in the cookie jar I have a lot of empathy and life experiences.
We both cried as we drove.
I believe she felt better afterwards.
We arrived at the mall half hour early for my appointment and V wanted to get some clothing for her two kids.
OMG!
I was in heaven.
Princess tee shirts.
Unicorn tee shirts. 🦄
Rainbow tee shirts. 🌈
I squiealed.
There were no adult sizes to my dismay.
Obviously not in a kids store.
From there I went in for my glasses and then shoe shopping.
Not for me.
I have two pairs of runners.
Work.
Casual.
I buy the same shoes all the time.
Eventually we found a pair at Sports Check that she liked.
As we were leaving I told the girl behind the counter that the young lady we had dealt with was very friendly and helpful.
It costs me nothing to tell someone they have done a good job and may make their day.
I don’t know but I do know that I get great joy in complimenting others.
I think some find it shocking how much I notice.
We had Burger King for lunch.
Sitting in the drive thru I notice the sign for mozza sticks.
Me (in my head): Damn mozza sticks sound good. Should I say something?
V (at same time):  And an order of mozza sticks please.
I looked at her and barked out laughing.
She thought I was laughing at her.
Until I explained my thought.
We are on the same page a lot of the time.
As we sat in the parking lot chatting and eating our burgers (chicken for her) we watched a squirrel racing back and forth.
V was telling me about how she spent her autumn watching the squirrel by her place storing the nuts.
How he would pick up an acorn test it and if good off he went with it and if not dropped it on the ground.
Just as she said that the little guy we were watching flew passed the car with a nut in its mouth.
We looked at one another and laughed.
Also yesterday I went and had my hair cut.
After six months.
Not a lot had to come off and my hair dresser was super impressed with the thickness and health of my hair.wp-16130929724913078974415820704339.jpg
I am guessing nigh on 7 months (209 days today wohoooooooo) and some of the damage is making its way out.
Also went for blood work up.
Which after I told my Dr. (who was really pumped to hear I had quit drinking) he included a liver function test.
I went in at 7:30 a.m. to have the blood work done.
So far no news fingers crossed the old adage follows: No news is good news.
Had me a proud mama moment yesterday.
As T is waiting for his dad to pick him up he is pulling items out of his book bag.
Plunks a flower pot down on the table in front on me.wp-16130930794042248242041186109719.jpg
T: Here I made this for you.
M (perplexed): Where did you get the pot?
T: The counsellor at school.
M: The counsellor?
T: Yeah there is this kid and his grandma died and he is having a hard time with it.
     So we go to the counsellor’s office together.
M: And do what?
T: Just chill. Do things like that.
M: Is this kid the same age as you?
T: Yeah he is in my class.
Me: Who picked you for this?
T: The counsellor did.
M (tears in my eyes): Your school counsellor chose you to help this kid?
T: Yeah
M: I am so proud of you T. OMG I love you so much.
T: Mom you would be proud of me if I made a $1.00

Little shit.

I am not book smart.
I know a lot of little things never really the whole thing.
But I do have a lot of life experience.
No more nor no less than the average person however I end up in the lives of people who seem to need me.
Who talk to me and I have had the exact same experience.
I can empathize.
I cry.
Right now I am not allowed to hug but I am a hugger too.
T looks to have developed that empathetic streak.
And I am more proud of that and that it is being recognized than I ever will  be of a report card full of A’s or entrance to an Ivy League school.
None of that is really important as long as the kindness I have seen him do or heard him talk about.
Have a fabulous weekend all.
I am working Today thru to Wednesday.
Than off Thur to Sun may the writing gods be kind to me.
©Feb. 12/21
Pictures are my own

Do I need my brain Poked?

Well I realize that this is not what is done when they stick and swab your nasal cavity but it is a better image is it not?
Poking the brain.
 
As I previously wrote this week Tember has a cold.
It is sticking around in the form of a cough.
Had I kept him home on Monday I am sure that rather then now missing the rest of the week he would be going  back today.
Live and learn.
And it is a cold.
A cold I tell you.
 
I called off work today.
I feel really guilty but I am coughing with a headache and sniffles.
I would much rather take today to feel better then be off for days on end.
My supervisor asked if I should be tested.
I said no. 
 
As a child growing up mom always said I was great for getting sick on the weekend.
Never during the week while she was working.
She also instilled in me the premise that one does not call off from work unless they are dying.
Or in a hospital bed.
Her mind set has since changed but it is one I still battle.
 
I am getting better a calling in and not pushing through being ill.
All it does is extend my feelings of shittyness.
But I still have that sense of guilt that because I can stand up and am not totally laid low that I should be at work.
It is a hard one to shake.
I could be on my death bed and would still feel guilty although I am working on that.
 
When I woke this morning I knew something was wrong. 
I had not slept well last night. 
Up at 2:30 when Loki decided that he was hungry and cried.
And cried.
And cried.
Then after feeding him he proceeded to cry some more.
Thomas was pushing him away.
So I had to take the food into my room.
Where Lucky’s bowl was because she has to eat right before bed under my bed so the other two leave her alone.
My head felt floaty.
My throat a little scratchy.
And as I moved I began to cough.
I did a self assessment.
Stood in front of the fridge going down the list.
 
I will provide a bit of background.
Since I was little whenever I get a cold it settles in my lungs.
Mom use to take me to the doctor a lot because I sounded like I was wheezing and gasping for breath.
When I cough(ed) I sound(ed) like a barking seal.
I wore a lot of hot mustard plaster during the winter months.
It seemed to work though.
Mom thought it was asthma.
I think she said the Dr. told her that I had weak lungs? 
Mom do you remember? (HE HE HE I Know you are reading)
 
I am also very in tune with my body.
It is not my thought only as my family Dr. has mentioned it.
I am not one of those who goes running every time I feel something is off.
I can assess what is happening and go from there.
 
Mom was a nurse.
So another thing that drilled into me as a child was you do not go to the Dr. unless something is seriously wrong.
Death bed or hospital…….
Going to the doctor when it is a simple cold/flu is unnecessary.
It is a waste of resources that can be used to help those who are truly ill.
Never mind wasting their time as well.
 
Which is why when I am being asked if I should go and be tested I give a resounding no.
I know my body.
I know in sickness and in health.
I have the start of a cold.
Complete with cough.
And no cough syrup.
Messaged the ex and asked if he could pick some up for me. 
Benylin Cough & Congestion. 
Works better then the other stuff.
For me.
I was coughing as I headed down the stairs and decided to nip in bud.
Opened and took a slug. 
When you have a cough like I do tablespoon does not cut it.
It hit me like a ton of bricks.
He had grabbed me extra strength.
Did not know that there even was extra strength.
 
I am now on couch.
Wrapped in blanket with my coffee.
Loki is settling to sleep on top of me.
I am going to cuddle with him and put something on the tv low as background.
Cartoons most likely so that when I fall asleep I won’t be missing anything important. 
And should work call and request it I will go and get my brain poked. 
 
Have a terrific Thursday loves.
 
©Oct. 22/20
Picture via Pinterest