Stuck in the Middle

Gosh darn it all I have gone and put T in the middle.
When you are a child of divorce and you yourself are separated with a child you want to be aware of the situations you were put in and avoid those with your own child(ren).
Well I hate to say it but I put T square in the middle of the vaccine debate between his dad and I.
And I have to learn to keep my big fat mouth shut with regards to his father around him.
 
Last evening when T got dropped off he went off on me.
Not off yelling and screaming but he let me know.
 
‘Even if you get the shot you can still get the virus mom.’
‘Yes T in the first 14 days you are right you can still pick up the virus. It will not make you ill but you will be a carrier. Meaning you could give it to your father without knowing it.’
‘Oh.’
‘Do you not want the vaccine?’
‘Yeah I don’t care.’
‘Do you or do you not want the vaccine? If you do not want it I will cancel your appointment right now.’ (you parents heard it)
‘No I want to be vaccinated.’
 
T is torn between a rock and a hard place.
Here is mom who has always looked after him and done the best whereas his father his filling his head with nonsense.  (I know folks I am working on the tone)
This is a man who use to be so science and fact based that he believed in nothing if it could not be proven.
 
I messaged the ex last night and asked him if he would like to come in and discuss the vaccine when he dropped T off.
I got back ‘if I have time.’
Huh.
I have been reminding myself over and over and over that I will listen.
I will not react without first thinking through my answer.
I will bite my tongue.
I will let him get everything out in the open.
If he has time.
If not well I tried at least.
 
©May 18/21
Picture is my own

I’m Done…..

Got my new tires put on my car this afternoon.
New used tires the ex got for me.
He installed them while I set up his Kindle for him.
First though I had to set up his email address.
Then I set up his Amazon account.
Signed him up for Freebooksy-free kindle book links.
Most of my books come from here and the authors I have discovered…..
I have so many books to read…..
As an aside my plan is to read more more more this summer.
Laying in the sun is good for that.
Back to the Ex.
You might wonder as to why I am doing all of this for him.
He is pretty tech illiterate but wants to start reading again so I am helping him out. If Tember also sees him reading I am hoping he too will pick up a book.
Also we work to be friends.
For Tember.
For ourselves.
After he put the tires on the car we were sitting in the sun talking. Or rather I was trying to read while he talked at me.
His phone starts pinging.
His girlfriend.
The woman who I have helped through numerous upsets with the ex.
Needless to say despite having been invited for dinner I am at home. Having leftovers.
It made her upset and uncomfortable that I was there so I left. This way she could come over and have an evening with him.
Tember was disappointed and folks I really wanted to say something but I kissed him and told him I would see him tomorrow.
I am done trying.
©July 4/20
Picture is my own. Taken from out front of my place July 3/20.