Word of the Day Challenge #91-Untitled Poem

Badgered
promised
worn down
told
you were enough
you were the one
I had been waiting for
the one
who would hurt me no more.
Prophesied
spells cast
love runes scratched
fate waited
whispers across the seas
I knew
I could feel
you coming for me.
Bow before
on my knees
supplication
eyes adore.
I see you
really see you
beneath
bluster
contained rage
desire
want
a place to lay
weary head
tired body.
Daddy’s babygirl
my gift to you
spurned
repudiated
tears falling
pain crawling
trust gone…..
I have been left
alone
bereft
lowly creature
it is not I
who fucked up.
©March 9
Picture via Pinterest

Sadness

Woke up sad again today. Tears falling. A general sense of lethargy. I am forcing myself to do my exercises even though I am really not in a mood.
When you tell people you are sad most, at least 90% in my experience, mitigate how you feel. There is a full moon. Oh you just need to get out more. Oh yeah so and so feels like that too you should talk to them. So I am going to chose very carefully who I tell.
Also, I have no energy to give to anyone but myself. I am not able to prop you up, hold your hand and be a cheerleader for you. I need to focus that energy on myself. To getting more well so I can go back to my regular day to day living.
When I sit, tears streaming down my face do not assume that I can be made to stop it you offer me chocolate or coffee. I may not even want or be able to talk but listening to you talk to me like I am a child is also not going to do anything for me.
I do not know why I am feeling sad. I do not know why I sit here crying. What I do know is I am exhausted of being there for everyone else and feeling like no one is there for me.
PS: Usually this would be when I would turn to pills to help me to cope with how I am feeling. I do not nor do I have the desire to dull this. I am letting the sadness wash over me and the tears fall. And I will come out stronger for having done so.