As Hard as it is I have to say Goodbye

The absence is felt

gaping

hole in my heart;

where once you resided.

Cut free

wrenched from my circle

my life

dimmer

for lack of you in it.

I have tried.

I have given space.

I have given time.

The divide is ever greater

and I ache

for the loss of a friend.

Someone who never judged.

Who always encouraged.

Who never let me falter.

And though the promise is in the air

I know

it won’t be kept

it cannot be kept

and my heart breaks

for I love you.

Adopted you.

You are family.

And sometimes

as in all families

I must learn to let go.

 

©Oct. 2/21

Picture is my own

Why Care?

Heart on Sleeve

Tears in Eyes

Rain

Thunder Overhead

Lightening Streaks

Crack

Boom

Just like myself

falling away

falling down

lost in the rabbit hole

afraid

knew that this would happen

pull knees close

head down

see not the pain

the fear

that fills these eyes

go away

like you promised never to do

leave me behind

broken

yet again

for foolishly believing

that we would always be friends.

I am closed.

I am reserved.

There are reasons that it takes me so long

to warm up

open up

to let you deep within

for everyone leaves me

even when they whisper promises

promises that they won’t

promises that forever they will hold my hand

they will always be

there…..

I love wholeheartedly.

I have no middle ground.

When I open up

When I let you in

When I lay bare my soul before you

it is because I believe(d)

those tender words

that you would be different

that you would never leave.

©April 26/21

Picture is my own