Tag: Grief

Malocchio

Black.
So very black.
Against verdant
emerald burns
gaping sorrow cuts deep
bloodless
no tears are left to shed.
Head bowed
keep eyes to the ground
so no one can see my rage
taking the simmering
vile soul sucking fury
wrapping it close
trembling taken as pain
hold me up.
I know.
I know what you do.
I know what you did. 
You bastard
my teeth shall rend
ten…..
no…..
twenty…..
(hear me roar)
no….. 
hundred fold…..
no…..
eternally
shall the pain
the degradation 
reaped upon her 
find you
devour you
roil you in unbidden needs
unsatisfied
this is my wish for thee.
No one hears those whispered words.
No one sees my little sneer.
No one sees the twist of my fingers
as I utter the curse.
When first I heard the proposal
this design to wrack ruin
upon your horrid manhood
I stuttered
flustered
until the visions came
Ready to sell my soul
to kill yours
for taking her life
her dreams
destroying them
all because she was greater than you
better than you.
Watch now
all shall shun
all shall run
never shall you be great again.
Malevolence is my name.
Vengeance my game.
My birthright.
My ability to make you pay
for all the pain
bleeding from your finger tips.
©Dec. 1/19
Picture via Pinterest
Malocchio-Evil

Word of the Day Challenge #42-Untitled Poem

***Please note that this poem is not indicative of how I am feeling today. I am in an extremely good place in life.***

Hush little baby
Don’t say a word
Mama’s gonna……
Mama’s gone.
No one left save me.
Voices howl in my head
concentrated 
telling me 
how useless
unloved
unwanted I am.
Hush little lady
Don’t say a word
Papa’s gonna…..
Dead as dust. 
Forgotten.
Blighted stain on family name.
Slew the dragon I did
with his death.
Hush little woman
Don’t say a word
Here’s a man
come to…..
There is no man
come to care for me.
Placating the demons
galloping
hooting 
screaming
tentacles entwined
heart ashatter
mind broken.
Hush hush…..
Forgotten innocence.
Sweet sister
Demon lover
don’t make a mess.
Keep your thoughts.
Keep your reality.
I will forge mine own.
subdued 
monsters sleep
a conscious moment for me.
©July 16/19
Picture via Pinterest

In My Arms….One more Time

I have watched the light grow dim in your eyes
as the energy fades away.
Never knew that pale pink skin
touched by loving hands
can take on such a gray pallor.
Your body is failing
there is nothing I can do
other than sit
your hand in mine
sleep more so than awake
which is good
for you cannot
will not
shall not
ever see the tears that I cry
as I wait my darling
for you to take your last breath.
Sinuous whisper
a gentle caress
I hold you tight in my arms
loving you
forever and always
even when you have left me behind.
Life ebbs away
I can see your spirit dissolve
a slight smile on your face
as pain recedes
even though I am dying
my beloved
why must you go?
I have no drive
no need
no desire
to continue on with this life
when you my dear
are cold
so far away
even when I can feel your embrace
diaphanous
strong
your voice in my ear
telling me I can go on.
Tears.
I sit next to your grave
hand resting slightly on the soil
wishing that for one more time
I could hold you in my arms.
©July 2/19
Picture via Pinterest
***This poem was inspired by loss and grief.***
Not my own but from conversations with others who have lost loved ones.

Untitled Word of the Day Poem #30

Finally took the rings off
unshackled my heart
unbound my soul
I finally am letting you go.
I have waited…..
waited
waited 
waited
for you to return to me
only to realize
I hid my eyes with blindness
preferring to look
upon times of the past
with more fondness
than I do when I look to the future.
It was hard
the day they came to the house
platitudes mouthed
yet…..
only I was the one crying.
I sit upon the bed we once shared
no longer do the sheets
or your pillows
smell like you.
The tee shirt I wear
shorts I pull on
a tribute to my love for you.
I am sorry my darling
it is so hard to let go
to let you rest in peace.
I kneel before your tombstone
sorrow
tears settling into the earth
as I whisper…..
‘I have delayed this too long
good bye my love.
Memories
I will hold tight 
your ghost
I must lay to rest.
Never forget…..
Always and forever
I will love you.’
©April 24/19
Picture via Pinterest and found by The Eclectic Contrarian for me.

Ta Ta

A sigh of finality
letting this fantasy go
what was shared
gone forever more.
Tears well
shedding 
scattering 
prisms in my eyes
glancing down
heart breaking
I can no longer deny.
I stalk you
you stalk me
we know
we follow
we want to be.
In each others lives.
I wonder sometimes
if I am a fool?
If I read too much?
Old time romance
flowers at my feet
sweet words whispered in my ear
swept away
knocked to my knees.
Tick tock
I watch the clock
counting down
hours
minutes
seconds
admitting finally
to myself
you love me no more.
Tears sparkle
rainbow prisms on the wall
I forget…..
desperate to forget
what you showed me.
Love
desire
trust.
Why did you damage me such?
Why did I damage you?
I look up
you look down
dimwit
kneeling here.
I realize
you have said your good-byes.
I accept it now.
I bow my head
so none can see
fool that I am.
See not the tears
tremors of hands
lips curled down
forlorn
lost…..
 
Ta Ta 
hear the bells ring
death knell 
to our dream.
 
March !6/19

Strangled

Strangled by the threads of expectation

pushed on one’s self 

until they are choking

unable to articulate their screams,

because today nobody cares.

Pushed into the rubber room,

walls plush with velvet padding

tormented screams rent the air

as demons play games.

Games of love, 

only to be shown that love is not for them.

Games of torture,

voices grinding in their ears

until they can take it no more.

Strangled by the threads of expectation

unable to bear 

this less than perfect image.

©Jay-lyn Doerksen

December 31/17