Woop Woop Woop Woop

This week has been a bit of a trying one for me.
The homework.
The crying.
The nagging.
It is enough to drive a person to drink.
Yes I am making a joke about it.
Because truth be told this week is one that would have sent me running to the LC before.
Now?
Make another pot of coffee.
Read posts.
Play games of my phone.
Calm down and still see the humor that is my life as a working mom.
Beginning Monday T will now be going to school every day.
On his off track day he will be in the Catch Up Room.
Unable to see anyone.
Until his work is caught up.
I make it sound like he is going to be in jail but he won’t be.
He is actually looking forward to going to school and I am happy he is going to get his work done.
We had another tete a tete the other day.
In which I stormed off after telling him that regardless of how he felt school needed to be done.
He needed to catch up on the work that he had fallen behind on.
I sat on my bed in the dark scrolling through FB deep breathing when I hear ‘mama mama?’
Grumpily I asked what as T sidled around the door frame holding his work book out like a shield.
He was asking me for help.
We sat down and worked on it together.
At the end of it he was rattling off numbers like there was no tomorrow.
I did allow a cut off given that the next set of questions were things such as 678=blank plus 13.
In the head.
Nah too much for this little brain of mine.
When I arrived home last night I turned car off and crept around to the back and tried to peer in his bedroom window.
Yes I totally know how it sounds and that I would have been hard pressed to explain to the cops what I was doing.
When I left for work yesterday I told T no t.v. and no X box until I got home.
And all his work had best be done.
I was foul humored yesterday.
Some moments I laughed.
For most part I was silently killing people off in my head.
I do not recall if I had anger issues with PMS as a younger person but holy hell if I did I am surprised I am not in jail.
For the most part would never have guessed I was not in a great mood.
Except for the people I confided in.
I swear there were lasers coming out of my eyes but as no one dropped to the floor screetching I believe it is safe to safe there were not.
Original idea was to come home and get T.
Go back and get the grocery shop done.
No way was I doing that last night.
I grabbed a few things before leaving and drove home.
Was nearly in an accident when the jackass doing 40 when I go to pass him jerks over in front of me.
I threw him/her the finger as I drove by.
Gasp!
Yes that is how angry I was.
I came in the house and dumped the first of the groceries.
Well cat food and litter.
My bag.
Went back for the drinks and chicken.
We sell the best rotisserie chicken ever so that was supper last night.
With Caesar salad.
T.V. on.
Dishes on counter still.
Deep breath.
Before I could say anything T launched into his litany of jobs done:
-Cleaned the bathtub using loofah and Tilex Bathroom Cleaner.
-He could not get the pitted stuff off he scrubbed though. Relieved to discover it is the bathtub pitting.
-Cleaned the toilet using Dill dressing that we did not like.
-Actually he dumped it down the toilet because we were never going to eat it.
-Dishes were put in dishwasher.
-He had vacuumed.
-All clothes were in the washer.
-He had wiped the sides of the toilet down.
I was very impressed with him.
Proud and told him so.
We have a bit of the times tables to due and ELA error thing to correct again.
Who uses that many damn commas in their writing?
In one paragraph there were nearly 30 commas.
Willy nilly that writer was tossing commas out like they were common rather than sparse and rare.
The pain has returned in my shoulder.
This is a result of my having to cashier more this week in a larger till as a fill in.
Today am going to talk to my supervisor about being in the smaller tills this morning and afternoon.
And now to leave all with a chuckle.
I woke up and had to go to the bathroom last night.
Stumbled out.
Decided I wanted a cookie and took the last wagon wheel.
Laying in bed in the dark eating my cookie trying to cool off because I was hot hot hot when I hear:
Woop Woop Woop Woop!
I screamed and kicked the cat at the end of my bed.
Covered my face with my hands and cookie.
T is crying he is laughing so hard.
Wants to know what was so scary.
I did not have my glasses on but I know his movements.
He sounds and acts exactly like Zoidberg from Futurama.
And who expects Zoidberg to show up outside their bedroom door??????
Have a Fabulous Friday everyone!
©March 5/21
Picture is my own
Video via Youtube

He Knows I’m Crazy

Went in this morning to wake T up and ask if he wanted to get up then (6 a.m.) or sleep until 7.
Obviously he chose the 7 a.m. wake up call.
I decided that it was time to check his phone. 
Something I have not done since he got it.
I trust my son.
I know every parent says that and then wonders how their child became a serial killer.
But I do.
He comes to me with things that I know he won’t talk about with his dad.
Regardless that is neither here no there.
I open his phone and decide the first thing that I was going to look at was his text messages.
I flip open and my eyes start looking down the list.
And see what I am listed as in his phone.
I burst out laughing so hard.
T half asleep: what why are you laughing what are you doing?
Me: Looking at your phone. I haven’t since I got it for you and I just saw how you have me named. I love it.
Crazy Lady I Came out Of. 
That is my handle.
Also and I am not sure where I heard this or if I have written it here before.
Regardless as far as I am concerned it is still funny.
I would really like to know who decided that this point of my life is called menopause.
Believe me I have not hit the pause button on my crazy hormone induced frenzy I just no longer have a physical aspect of it.
And I highly doubt that at age 60 I am suddenly going to say:
Hey you know what I really miss being hormonal and nearly killing people every 28 days or so.
Where is the unpause button? 
I would really like my period back.
Ha! 
There is not a woman around who is going to want it back.
I mean I could be wrong but I cheered and would have done cartwheels if I did not fear falling on my face.
Have a great Tuesday all.
Hope that I sent you off with a smile on your lips and a cheer in your heart.
©Feb. 23/21
Picture is my own