Rending

Locked in my mind
vicious voice
rending my soul
my belief
in self.
Denouncing the strength
the knowledge
riding over affirmations
burying them in the cemetary dark.
I am lost
I am tired
I am afraid
to look down this road once more.
My knees shatter
I offer up beseechment
leave me alone this time
I won’t fight the next.
Thick mimosia
clinging
wrapping
entangling
knock me from my feet
blood flows
tears collapse
as I shudder beneath.
You silly bitch
hissing voices scream
you have no control 
you have no ability
to rid yourself of me.
©Jay-lyn Doerksen
July 18/18

See me go

You believe in me, the person that I can be

dancing beneath the velvet night sky

Twisting and turning. Romance abounds

or is that my imagination?

I love, I learn, I yearn and I dream

I want to feel your truth

pull me into the warmest embrace

Make me feel your pain.

The acceptance I want, that I desire

you promised to me

Silently, vocally, telling me you understand

and yet, you run for the hills.

I am not a superstar, nor am I normal

I bleed and I flail, hanging by a thread

as I wait for you to see me go.

© Jay-lyn Doerksen

March 12/17