Society’s Norms

Yesterday during my massage my therapist and I were discussing relationships.
And how they are defined.
We talked about what was the point in being with someone if you can see you are not going to marry them?
I never wanted to get married.
I have always struggled in relationships with men as I lost myself in the care of them.
But at the same time I enjoy the company of men.
In more ways than just conversation if ya catch my drift. 😏😏😈😈
Which lead me to thinking about how society defines us.
Grow up.
Get married.
Have kids.
Retire.
Die.
I mean yes there are a whole lot of things that are going on but to be succinct about it a brief list.
From the time that we are children everything around us is defined by adults.
Our ideas.
Our morals.
Our viewpoints.
As teenagers we begin to suss out our places.
We begin to discover who we are.
Who we want to be.
If we are lucky.
Some of us take a little longer.
Some of us miss out on teendom due to home life circumstances.
As adults we are suppose to have a firm grip on our wants and needs.
We are to put aside the childish and lose our wonder.
Forget the magic that resides in all of us.
Be stoic.
Work and pay bills.
Buy more things.
Hope for more happiness.
More and more I realize who I want to be and who I am.
I can tell you if ever faced with a situation that I have been morally outraged over would I have the courage to take a stand?
I don’t know in all honesty.
But I want to be a voice.
I want to spread joy.
I want to spread laughter.
A lot of laughter.
I want to love being who I am with everything I am.
Which brings me around to the conversation about relationships.
And how for society it is defined so rigidly.
Man and Woman.
We are beginning to loosen up.
We are beginning to accept that there are more than just the set definition that has played out for centuries.
How I live my life and my relationships are my business.
No one one needs to know about them.
No one needs to know if I am hanging out with one man or 10.
And no one should they know need to have any opinion about it.
Yesterday T and I were having a conversation about this as we sat in the line up at A&W.
T: I thought that you don’t have relationships mom.
Me: I don’t. I have friendships. But does it matter if I have one guy or 10?
T: Nooooooooooooo.
Me: It’s okay buddy I only have 5.
T: That’s goo…….wait what?
Me: OMG your face.
I laughed so hard.
T was not impressed.
All I can say is this: As long as all adults are consensual it does not matter how you live and love. Be Safe. Stay Safe. And Live your Love your way.
©April 19/21
Picture is my own

Rawr!

I was that girl
faded
quiet
always on the outskirts
looking in
lost
alone
afraid.
I was that teenager
wild
frantic
lost
a whirl storm
emotions
deadly
unforgiving
I lost myself to hell.
Young woman.
Mother.
During it all
part of me
lodged still
in bars of my own creating
mired in the cesspool of past abuses
unseen
unwanted
until addiction’s hold passes.
Today
victory reigns
head held high
as I behold
who I have become
who I want to be
who I need to be…..
Caring
Empathetic
Loving
Wanting
Dreaming
Desiring
Life.
I am what society now calls middle age.
I refuse to accept their constraints.
I am a Goddess.
I am a Lioness.
I am a Queen.
Never again will I forget.
©April 12/21
Picture via Pinterest