Mother’s Creation

Never read ‘The Babysitters Club’ as a teen/pre-teen. Netflix has a series. And I binged. Loved it.

As a parent I might be a little lax with regards to what Tember watches. He has seen both It movies. With his dad. He has watched American Dad. Family Guy. Bob’s Burgers. And I have no issues.

Lately though he has become hooked……on shows I watch……

He loves my show picks. Has no clue what his dad watches at all. Informed me today that it was impossible that I could always pick shows he wants to watch yet I do. Well now if this does not prove that he has my tastes I do not know what will.

Right now…..I am finishing up Ozark and he is watching……The Babysitters Club.

Today is different from when I grew up. Our shows now are divided into two areas of interest…….baby/young adult-adult/reality. I had innocence. It is not that during the ’70’s in my world there were no problems……I was not aware. Unlike today where everything and anything is put on t.v.

I do not have cable. I have Netflix and Amazon Prime. My interests range from historical to historical mystery (Murdoch Mysteries) to dark shows (Ozark-Better call Saul) to light musicals (Glee) to young adult (The Babysitters Club) I watch what I want when I want. And the child has same tastes.

I have forbidden Tember to watch one show. Sons of Anarchy. I draw the line here. I explained to him that it was situational……that it had to do with family…..ideals of family…..but the violence is graphic and I felt that it was not appropriate for him to watch. And he informed me that it was about a biker gang and he has no desire to watch/witness/see what the show depicts.

I know there are going to be those who disagree with my parenting style. We are all different. How we teach our children. What we want them to learn. What we are willing to let slide and what cannot.

Tember watching adult cartoons. Least of my worries. What I do worry about…..bullying….grades…..contentment….mental health…..kindness…..

All I want is to bring my child up to respect women. To work for his living. To not feel he is entitled because he is white. To be kind. Empathic. To stick up for those who are afraid or who have no voice. I want Tember to be better than me.

I realize these are huge ideals. That I am pushing Tember to be more kind than I am no illusions. But he befriended a boy he bullied. They now play on-line video games.

When I received the email…..I was livid. When I asked Tember about it he told me he knew I was going to be mad. He spent all night thinking about it. When he explained situation I asked him to explain how asking if one thinks Minecraft is dumb or is ******dumb. Tember raised his hand indicating he thought ****** was dumb. Told me he misunderstood the question.

I told him I was disappointed. That I had taught him better. That I had taught him to speak up for those who cannot/will not. He demanded to me what I would have done? No one would listen to him anyways. I looked at him and told him ‘were you to have stood up and said no this is wrong. This is not how we treat others.’ Even if they did not listen you did the right thing.

Believe me I am not the best role model. I do not always practice what I preach. I do not always practice behaviour I want Tember to emulate.

What I do try to do is show Tember the world through kind and caring eyes. To see others before he sees himself. To be better than I am.

I have a beautiful boy. He has a kind heart. He is beginning to see the world around him differently. He is beginning to realize everything is not black and white.

My legacy… unto the world a man who sees with his heart…..thinks with his mind…..using facts…..showing compassion and understanding. At least this is what I hoe my legacy will be. If I can keep him from picking his nose in public….I consider that a win. LOL

©July 11/20
Picture is mine






Giggles of the Week

A few things that made me laugh:
We have a flat of 30 med eggs on for $4.99. A pack of 18 large eggs is $4.62. Needless to say I was running back and forth a lot returning the 18’s and grabbing the ’30’s. I come back from grabbing a flat for a dad and daughter and hand them off. As I did I was asking the dad ‘to please flip the eggs over’ while I was gesturing to his Air Miles card. His daughter looks at me funny and slowly turns the eggs over. Her dad was laughing and I explained I had flipped the eggs with air miles because I had just finished getting the eggs for them. She starts to giggle and looks at her dad ‘well I thought she might know something about eggs we don’t. Maybe you should be turning your eggs upside down.’
With another customer segued from a conversation about candy from Nutty Club (Canadian Company makes candy and other things) into how I almost overdosed as a child due to thinking that sleeping pills were candy corn. This was the ’70’s fun and funky colors for all. As we were talking and my customer was rolling with laughter I came to the conclusion that I was and am still incredibly klutzy. I use myself as comedic fodder. Not sure if the stories are really as funny as I think they are or if it is the way the I tell it.
Tember announced today that he will never be able to come into Sobeys if I did not stop telling stories about him. Said how would anyone know who he was? I only tell my customers. It is not as though I am pulling out my phone and showing pictures of him. I am not describing him. Other than generically. 11 years old. Male. Blonde. Funny. Loves to talk. And will not shower. Yes that is right I am still living the struggle of a child who believes showering is an option not a requirement. And I nag way too much about this lack according to him.
Came home from work yesterday to dishes not being done. Chores in general not being done. And I called Tember out. He responds with ‘But mom I showered without you even having to nag at me!’ I look at him and ask ‘So which did you catch a whiff of? Feet or your pits?’ ‘My pits mom.’
Today has got to be the best yet:
‘Mom I do not know how you do it!’
‘How I do what?’
‘How do you get the dishes to not smell?’
He leaves glasses in his room and things congeal……this is why he is now in charge of doing the dishes on his week here.
Hope that I have given you a small smile at least.
Have a fabulous Wednesday Evening/Thursday Morning depending on where you are at.
©July 8/20