Scared Again

Last weekend I found out that season 2 of Nancy Drew was on Prime. I was delighted and promptly settled in for the evening.

I sat here and once more was sucked into the story of Nancy Drew, her dad and her birth father. Who her birth mother was. How they were dealing with a supernatural element. It had me glued to the t.v.

Even when I know that there is a scene coming up that is going to scare me I still scream bloody murder. And then I had to go to the bathroom but there was this intense scene coming. Yes I am fully aware that I could have paused it but I am a weird one.

Me: Oh my god. Oh my god! (holds hands to cheeks/peering at t.v.) Jay you are going to scream. You are going to scream. Jay you are going to scream. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

And I covered my eyes. After going into the bathroom I went into T’s room and asked if he wanted to come and watch with me.

T: Mom no. You are just weird. Who stands there telling themselves that they are going to be scared and still gets scared? The neighbors are going to think that you are a strange one.

Several times too T has scared me without meaning to. By appearing in places that he should not be. Like standing in his doorway when I am going into wake him. Coming up behind me when last I saw he was sleeping.

And every time I scream. Then laugh. I do so love to be scared.

Jan. 27/22

Lessons

Hear the complaints
see the disgust
time is passing by
when will life get back
when will normality return?
Why?
So quick everyone is
work
school
sports
art
computer
the list on the fridge
goes on and on
every minute
to the second
of every day is planned
’til exhausted
one drops into bed.
Look around
what do you see?
Look around
what do you hear?
Birds singing
clearly heard
lack of traffic
makes it so.
Streets
quiet
stores
no longer a meeting place.
Wait…..
hear that I do
sweet giggle of child
deep baritone of dad
as together they play
slowed down
spending time
with each other
learning their truth.
We have a chance
a choice
to create a new future
a slower future
where emphasis is
family
friends
life in its beauty
nature
seen now by eyes
appreciated
reclaimed.
Do not forget
or
lost shall be
these lessons learned.
©May 7/20
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