As I was showering Sunday morning I suddenly realized that I could never kill someone……and get away with it.
First off is that it is a crime. It comes with jail time. It comes with infamy. No thank you. And orange makes me look so sallow.
Than I would dither about how I would kill them. Do I use a knife? A gun? Rope? Hammer?
My poor victim would be staring at me in horror as I was trying to figure out which weapon I wanted to use.
Than do I want to be up close and personal or from a safe untainted with corruption spot elsewhere?
(This is how I will kill them-death by indecision.)
So I have gotten this far what comes next?
The clean up.
And you know you never ever get all the blood.
You would be crawling around on your knees, microscopic eye trying to detect the slightest spatter of human matter.
Clean up would have to be done with the black light and than you find out what else is all over that room. (Gross need I say more?)
Too talkative. I like to talk. I would be remembered.
‘Yes officer I am sure that is the one. She would not shut up for a minute.’
I would by and large leave enough DNA evidence it would be unbelievable. I shed copious amounts of hair.
As I watched my hair go down the drain I realized that I would need to get Drano or something soon.
Which lead me to than think about today’s word radioactive.
What if when I poured it down the drain a giant hairball came to life.
Than I thought I would get T to do it. However there is some law that says you cannot put children in danger. Not even if it is to fight off a radioactive hairball.
So there you have it. Why I could not commit murder and get away with it. But I am a writer mwahahahahaha I will kill you 100x on paper.
young and old
this is a precautionary tale
of why one should listen
Little Lance was an adventurer.
He slayed dragons.
He climbed bean stalks.
He swam the warm waters of the Caribbean
with Green Teeth Pirate King.
As he grew
morphed into Big Lance.
He never lost his sense of fun
The abandoned factory
settled into the ground
an odd piece of mystery
set no where
was a no go zone.
Children are warned to stay away
but all children become teenagers.
well they ain’t that smart.
Their brains have ceased to fire
only a small portion active….
usually the stupid one.
Big Lance was dared one day
where no one else had gone….
Big Lance gazed around
wondering where he should go first.
He wandered here.
He wandered there.
Stymied by locks
Big Lance began to worry.
the reality began to dawn on him.
He began to backpedal
when he tripped
slime dripping from jagged
Big Lance disappeared
The Factory that day.