Thinking you have control over anything is an illusion. Nothing is concrete but fluid for it is determined by your own actions and reactions to any given situation.
And like Pavlov’s dogs salivating at the chime of a bell, my body becomes flushed and there is a brief moment, when my heart lifts and hope rises, when I hear the throaty growl of an engine. I admit to peeping out the window on more than one occasion. But the fact remains, there are a lot of fricken trucks in my neighborhood with that throaty growl and they all use the car wash next to my house.