Autumn’s Tears

Always wrong
tears
slow seep
caress
salted lips
fear
pain
wishes
all out in front
no lies
no mistruths
everything is as I want it
everything is as I see it
everything is a lonely space
for while I reach
you pull away
leaving me searching for more.
What happened to happy ever afters?
Why am I so scarred
men would rather run
then see the nightmare sitting 
waiting 
with bated breath
for me to stumble
for me to fall
for like a lover
it will catch me
cradle me
while destroying me.
No longer willing to try.
No longer willing to not be a choice.
No longer willing…..
to accept less then
to being second place 
to being only useful when you want me.
There is more
a light
failed to be seen
your loss
not mine
so sorry
hope that graveyard of dreams
of broken wants
of destroyed needs
fill your nights
in ways 
I seem unable to.
Tip my hat.
Time to go.
So sorry.
So hard.
Bye bye.
I can no longer wait to be yours.
 
©Oct. 8/20
Picture is my own

Are we in love?

Are we in love?

Is this just a silly game? 

One we play with each other?

Are we in love?

And if we are,

why do we keeping hiding it 

from one another?

Crimson displays of violet sunsets

children play in the park

laughter and love is all around us

and yet still we do not trust.

I will hold your hand

but leave your heart

I don’t want to cause you pain.

Maybe one day we will be brave

and hasten to arrive

at this altar built to serve.

Until than though

we shall sit in silence

and wonder…..

are we in love?

©Jay-lyn Doerksen

 November 8/17