I am not a Monster

Malicious laughter
grating in ear
hair gripped tight
hands grabbing
holding
pulling free
tearing clothing off
taking what does not belong
nor freely given.
Heavy breath
face pressed to concrete
tears
unshed
glitter on lashes
bite marks
guttural moan
you are done with me.
Little white boy
daddy’s paid
cronies bought
rape
turned into…..
between two drunken teens.
Liar
liar
pants on fire
you heard me say no…..
you heard me say no motherfucker 
two more times.
Innocent you are
judged so
by misogynistic men
with black skeletons
dastardly sins
locked in their own closets.
You begged.
You pleaded.
You screamed no.
Over…..
and over…..
and over.
Imploring with me
mouthing false apologies
thinking to sway
my soft feminine heart.
Walked away
heard the piteous moan
so unlike the one
you made
taking from me
safety
peace of mind.
I am not a monster.
Called an ambulance I did
vigilante justice
you will never
ever
hurt another woman again.
©Feb. 8/20
Picture via Pintrest

Avenging Demon Lass

Black venom
noxious
thick
slithers through these veins
feeding upon
darkness
bleak thoughts
suicidal
pain fed
screech
horror
grip the bars
wrought iron
of this cage
howling
lines scored into skin
as you sing
once loose 
better run
cause I will come
hunting 
for you
for those who baited me
used me
sucked dry
heart
soul
husk 
on the side of the road
soft crooning
rocking
forth
back
madness
fired in your eyes
sanity
finger tip away
single touch
avenger
protector
huntress in the night
blood red lust
blinded dreams
gutted in the alley
left to bleed out.
©Jan. 26/20
Picture via Pinterest

Deadly Beauty

Wild eyed
fanged teeth glisten
saliva slicked lips
pulled back in a grimace
sucking
putrid black
evil from your soul.
No redemption from me.
Coppered curls
move in the dark
sibilant whisper
turn your head
this way
that way
you will not find
you will not see
the company we keep
until it is too late.
No pity from me.
Baby
how long?
How long did you think
before someone
somewhere caught on
forcing you out of here?
Did you think that it was going to be me?
Saw me watching
smiled at you
hooded eyes
lusty with desire.
Come big boy let’s play.
No mercy from me.
Cloaked shadows
scorn upon my lips
words rip
shred
did you expect me to cheer?
Hip Hip Hurray.
Ease into the corner
life gone
malignancy abated
babes resettle to curls
fangs sheathed
delicate lick of the fingers
such a delicious treat…..
Who said all gorgons are evil?
©Jan. 17/20
Picture via Pinterest

 

Devil’s Bride

I am on fire
my own hell on earth
flames lick at the corner of my soul
and I know
the Devil awaits.
I tried so hard to be a good girl
the way I had been taught
how to pleasure men
while keeping my mouth shut.
I was sent in
listen and learn I was told
report back to me when you are done.
I loathed the man who called himself my father
he was no creator
no progenitor
that I would claim as mine.
Dressed as a whore
face made up with paint
alcohol to numb the pain
but only a little
because I had to hear and repeat.
All that was said
all that was seen.
Time passed
I hardened
becoming this vicious creature
frothing with quiet rage
desperation born of no one’s care.
My first victim?
Can you call the man who sold me
who beat me
who plyed my body as trade
a victim?
The next few
well they were a revenge
for having used me as a child.
The raping of my soul
black
lurid
hatred filled
left me a brittle husk
stronger than most
for I could pretend.
I see his shape rising
smell the brimstone and smoke
the heat of the flames 
sear my body 
yet I felt nothing.
I am evil .
I am rage.
I am revenge in the night.
I am the nightmare
that small little girl
who is going to run amok
razing
destroying
creatured in blood
cavorting in your dreams.
Time for me to dance
tempt
tantalize
to move as a shadow
become the assassin
I was bred to be.
Forgotten is compassion.
Forgotten is love
Forgotten is all that is good….
Within me
vicious anger ready to play
I sidle up in your life
the last thing you will see
before the knife slices into your heart
is my face
my smile
your living nightmare come true.
I have become his bride
he my groom
no campaign needed
hell he made home
allowing me a special place
in the gloom
to play with little men….
getting my revenge.
©Jan. 10/19
Picture via Pinterest

Balance the Scales

Fingers grip blanket tight
squeezing eyes shut.
Whispered prayer
never answered:
maybe tonight
the monsters won’t come
please keep me safe
someone.
Dead gaze
never a smile
how could no one notice
how could they not see
the wraith walking before them?
A child
bruised
skittish
afraid of all
falling between the cracks.
Too many fingers
too many hands
too many mouths
rape a child’s soul
battered
wanting to die
indomitable will
refusing to give up
refusing to allow suicide.
Growing
becoming a woman
tables turning
hunting those who hunted
child turned avenger
all will pay.
©Jan. 8/20
Picture via Pinterest

Split Second

I wonder did you look back as you walked away? I know that you did not. I know for I stood at the living room window hidden behind the drapes. You would have seen the shadow of me peeking after you. My heart shattered. Trite I know but at my feet lay a thousand pieces. How could you leave? How could you go? I thought you loved me. I thought you cared.With wicked disregard you tore my life apart. I was a fool. Always have been you sneered at me. 
Multiple women in our bed. Vicious beating when supper was late. Lived with fear clothed in a lie of love now stripped bare. Clouds suddenly parting as I saw the vile man that you are. Mean. Little. Spittle spewing as you scream at me. Hair plucked from head standing on end cocking my head I look at you. Strange how you went from the love of my life to the object of my hatred in the blink of an eye. Scales pulled ripped off like scabs. Brutal pain spears through the heart and then a sting of stupidity a flash of hatred for my own self that I had fallen so far.
Began as a flatterer a wooer of love. Whispers in my ears of what a beautiful girl and I allowed you to fill my sight. I never noticed when my friends fell away as you became my entire being. Once alone isolated your began a campaign of terror that would last this entire time. Captive in my own home. Afraid to risk being seen going to the far side of town to shop. Hiding my face with make up and hats that did nothing to camouflage the bruises old and new. Multiple broken arms and wrists. A few head traumas. All enough to weaken me further to ensure that I would remain at your side……your very own live punching bag for when life became too much. 
I saw the light beckoning as you walked away. That is how I knew. That you never looked back as you entered death.
I gazed upon your bloody face. An expression of surprise. Eyes wide open. Caught as you roared how dare you who do you…..thunk
I have called the police.
Best put on the coffee it is going to be a long night. 

Jan. 7/20

Malocchio

Black.
So very black.
Against verdant
emerald burns
gaping sorrow cuts deep
bloodless
no tears are left to shed.
Head bowed
keep eyes to the ground
so no one can see my rage
taking the simmering
vile soul sucking fury
wrapping it close
trembling taken as pain
hold me up.
I know.
I know what you do.
I know what you did. 
You bastard
my teeth shall rend
ten…..
no…..
twenty…..
(hear me roar)
no….. 
hundred fold…..
no…..
eternally
shall the pain
the degradation 
reaped upon her 
find you
devour you
roil you in unbidden needs
unsatisfied
this is my wish for thee.
No one hears those whispered words.
No one sees my little sneer.
No one sees the twist of my fingers
as I utter the curse.
When first I heard the proposal
this design to wrack ruin
upon your horrid manhood
I stuttered
flustered
until the visions came
Ready to sell my soul
to kill yours
for taking her life
her dreams
destroying them
all because she was greater than you
better than you.
Watch now
all shall shun
all shall run
never shall you be great again.
Malevolence is my name.
Vengeance my game.
My birthright.
My ability to make you pay
for all the pain
bleeding from your finger tips.
©Dec. 1/19
Picture via Pinterest
Malocchio-Evil