This is going to be the funniest thing y’all have heard this week. And it stars your lovable klutz, me! Only this time it has nothing to do with my injuring myself. And everything to do with a change to a podcast that I had been listening to.
Instead of music when I go to bed, I like to listen to thunderstorm sounds. However given fan running it requires my phone being turned all the way up.
After T and I got our phones last week, Sunday night I pulled up IHeartRadio to begin listening to my podcast. In the time from Tuesday when mom arrived to Sunday evening a change had taken place. The podcast I was listening to no longer existed. Another one had taken its place. This one was ad supported which leads into the rest of the story.
The first night I had just drifted off to sleep when a man and woman began to speak very loudly in my bedroom. I jerked awake and realized that it was my phone. The ads had begun. At top volumn. I turned podcast off and went back to sleep. Forgetting all about this.
Tuesday night I had forgotten all about the ads. I put the podcast on and quickly fell asleep. I awoke screaming at the top of my lungs, sitting up in bed, throwing the covers back. The man and woman were back! What I was going to do if there really had been a man and woman in my bedroom I don’t know. I got up and went to bathroom. Settled down my heart.
Wednesday night I am laying in bed. I put on the podcast and reminded myself that there was an ad. I did not know at what point. I thought that I had mentally prepared myself. I was just drifting off to sleep when the voices again began. I shrieked Jesus Fucking Christ as I leapt from bed. The cats were certain that something was very very wrong. With me.
I settled back down and again was drifting off when again the voices went off. I again screamed and that was it. Turned the podcast off.
Last night I thought about it and decided that I would look to see if there was an app that I could download. And there was. For Rain Sounds. I download it and settled down for the night. It only plays for 20 minutes so I do not need to set a timer. And best of there are no ads, ergo there are no more voices suddenly speaking to me when no one else is here.
Aug.13/22
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