Whispers in my ear

Can you hear me? See me?

are you aware that I am here

the voice that whispers in your ear;

making you insane.

No one will believe you

no one will ever care

you mean nothing my dear

can you hear?

Daily I fight this battle

trying so hard to ignore the voice

the one that tells me all the time

how wrong I am on this earth.

I counter the voice within my head

list upon list of my deeds

I need to center and balance it out

or else I will lose my mind.

This voice has been with me for always

listing out how I am not worth-

not worth the love, the tenderness

not worth a moment of happiness.

Some days I am the winner

the voice is shut down and out

some days I am the loser

and I begin to doubt.

©Jay-lyn Doerksen

August 22/17

 

 

 

Acceptance

I brood, and I snarl with disgust, watching you slither

your voice is but a whine pitched deep in my ear

a whine that I want to stop

a whine replaced by a blade?

Pin pricks dotted with blood

you yelp and you disclaim

Am I suppose to hear your sorries

am I suppose to really believe you are sane?

I know the voices I hear are my own

there are no others within my head

So here is the fear that you must accept

I am always going to make you pay.

 

©Jay-lyn Doerksen

March 2/17

 

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