Trueheart

Beholden
to public
to reality
to images
past
present
future
is something remiss?
I am not who I seem.
I am not who I play.
I am a woman.
I am a toy.
I am……
submissive.
Cradle my head
hold my soul
care for me
while I long for
it all.
Misconception
weak I am not
giving up my faith
my trust
my everything
to give you control
to allow you in
to let you lead…..
something most do not understand.
I desire
need
feed
on structure
rules
guidance
for I would care not for self
if you did not insist.
I am worthless
unless I am in your eyes.
I am crying
unless I am in your arms.
I am dying
alone
scared
desperate.
Please
oh please
keep me safe
hold the monsters at bay
while I sleep.
©July 4/19
Picture via Pinterest
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Untitled Poem Word of the Day #16

She was such a pretty little thing.
Daddy’s girl.
Pigtails.
Dimples.
Sparkling blue eyes.
No knowledge of degradation
humiliation
pain
that was yet to come.
Prepped.
Primped.
Primed.
Salacious thoughts
for one so young.
Daddy had a problem.
Drunk.
Drugs.
Gambling.
He was shitty at all three.
Sold to pay the debt
her hunger only grew.
Wicked child.
Devil’s child.
Vicious child.
She was a bright child
so smart
she hid the abuse
beneath rosy smiles..
Lessons were learned
games were played
daddy’s girl became a vixen.
Knives were made to slash
slice
rend flesh free.
Guns with bullets
holes in the body
none are safe from her.
Sitting
crimson pool spreading
her delight in the debris.
It took nearly a month
to reassemble the pieces
of the men she slaughtered.
Found buried in a shallow grave
clues were slim
men 
they were not missed.
She sat watching
waiting
but no one came near
into the midnight she disappeared. 
 
Feb. 1/19

Untitled Love Poem #1

Seared
desert bowl
sand in the air
rain has been a long time coming.
Cornrows bow their laden heads
wheat
burning
beneath the summer sun.
Rain
torrents falling
awakening parched soil
creating an oasis.
Finally
it has broken
everyone looks to the heavens and prays.
Violent boom
bolts of lightening
rage across the sky.
Ozone
a taste on the tongue
passion
desire
two bodies becoming one.
Melding
merging
entwined in each other
into her ear
he whispers
‘I have missed you
my love.’
Gentle smile
pull him closer
lifting her hips
they lose themselves
lips meeting
soft sighs.
They come together
two who are one
made whole
neither wanting to part again.
Nov. 10/18

Perfect Man

He seemed to be the perfect man
holding doors
ordering wine with care
dinners out in high end places
a life she could never afford.
She ignored the warnings
the tides
the signs
believing that her prince had come
while her friends watched in fear.
Becoming lost in him
losing her way
her soul
her very being
until she was no more.
Sucked dry
withered
sered
eroding away
her life force.
Beside her
carefree
restored to youth
a man who only takes
never giving in return.
Oct. 6/18
Photo by Daniel Apodaca on Unsplash

Little Brown Hen

Looking at her
you would never foresee
the secret life that she leads.
How when darkness falls
she slides through the shadows
a nightmare
caught in the corner of your eye.
Pray that you have not sinned
pray that if you have
it is a small one
that can be overlooked
forgiven
unpunished.
Larger sins
vices that harm
those will be the ones that she notices
that must be fixed.
Howled fear
repentance
finally acceptance
until silence does reign.
The last thought in your mind
how nondescript she looks
how nonthreatening
until her knife rips you apart.
Aug. 20/18
Photo by Jordan Whitt on Unsplash

Howling at the Moon

Last night
wrapped within the warmth of your arms
forgetting that there were others around
my moans became a wailing tune
as you made me howl to the moon.
Twisting and turning
sheets entangled with legs
mouths reaching
senses bleeding
as we became one.
Lost
our moans filled the house
forgetting how thin the walls can be
let’s just say
this morning with red face
I felt so awkward
as everyone pretended they had heard nothing.
Photo by Matthew Kane on Unsplash

I Fought

As a young child
I stood upon the shore
staring across the waters
wondering
wishing
I knew what was on the other side.
As a teenager
I was told what a girl could do
should do
was expected to do
I wondered why the rules were so different.
As a young woman
I married a man
who did not love me
who controlled me
who dominated me
who damn near destroyed me.
I fought to get free
I fought to break the chains
I fought to reclaim my life
I fought once more 
for the wanderlust in my heart.
Now I am here
in the waning years of my life
once more upon the shore
ready to lay my weary bones down
to slow down
to remember
the travels I fought so hard for.
Photo by Tessa Rampersad on Unsplash