Forgotten Tenderness

This poem feeds from Haunted Memory written in response to the Word of the Day Challenge: Independent
 
Cupped
soft hand to cheek
brush thumb
trembling lips
not 
desire
lust
attempt 
keeping tears
in check
shy away
cannot let see
pain felt
you
leaving me.
Watching
leaning
hot face 
cool pane
allowed now
tears falling 
unchecked
soaking your shirt
I stole 
worn now to nothing
your scent 
gone so long
last remembered.
Cold nights
warmth fled
letting go
hard to do.
Done with poise
done without regret
this
I shall always lie to you.
 
©Sept. 13/20
Picture via Pinterest

Directory of Pain

***This poem portrays a very bleak vision of myself. While I do have a constant mental health checklist I am going over every so often I wonder if I am fooling myself. I am not anywhere near the darkness portrayed in this poem.***

Peering
nose pressed to mirror
eyes darting
checking
evaluating.
Lackluster smile
tired from being on
day in
day out
cheerleader for all
no one to cheer me.
Lines etched
creased
no longer smile
frown
pursed lips
unhappy
pressing closer
looking for
trying to find
the girl
the one I was before.
Listening
intently
is that a whisper
chirp of bitter voice
striving to return
tears seep
am I going insane?
am I already there?
Check list
one…..
two…..
three…..
seem to pass
yet it is there
niggling worry
depression riding blackened cloud
ready to attach itself
bleed my beating heart
returning me to desolation
to despair…..
do you hear it too?
©July 7/20
Picture is my own