Absolution of Self

Ever sat
deep pit welling inside
blank eyed stare
sunlight does not penetrate
darkness
no less inkier
than the space I am in.
Trembling
black chasm
right beneath my feet
blinded so
by the roaring voices
pushing out all other thoughts
all other sounds.
Falling
arms spread out
let me go
I hate you
it is my turn
it is my time……..
Vicious
lips drawn in rage
I turn back
face to face
I will battle
I will win
I will never
not ever
fall to my knees
chained by the past
from which
I have broken free.
Bowed head
on my knees
shattered
not beaten
not again shackled
trapped in whirling vortex…..
I am free.
I loosed the beast
roar into the night
fly
my fears
my addictions
my hurts
my angers
leave me……
Absolved.
A babe born anew
a canvas
awaiting
awakening
to the beauty within.
©Feb. 24/20
Picture is my own

Ebbing Love

I watch
wondering
wandering
waiting
for slowly
my worth
my truth
my veracity
becoming known
opening myself
to opportunities
while you
well
you may not like what transpires.
Standing tall
no more hiding
no more pretending
I am beauty
I am love
I am creative
I am……
all of the above.
Becoming tired are you?
Annoyed
with my shouting from rooftops
glorying
in self worth
in self awareness
in self love
making me
a woman to beware of.
Always headstrong
I fight
for the things that I want
the future I see
tangible
to the touch
to what I desire.
I am done
waiting
while you waffle
right
wrong
yes
or no?
When you decide
darling do not be surprised
if I am no longer there.
©Feb. 24/20
Picture is my own

Queenly Insanity

Thrown to the wolves
left to fend
for self
for child
thought to die
laughed as snow began to fall
revenge sought
retribution done
requital I swore
even as I fell to my knees.
I crawled.
I wept.
I thought to freeze to death.
No…..
I would not let you win.
I would not let you crown
another in my place
in my space
she…..
two faced whore.
I strove
pulling self to feet
courage
rage
kept me moving
as thunder roared
heart beating.
always have been
it would behoove you
to remember.
For come I will
in dead of night
pay the toll dear
will you and she
while I sit above
watching you bleed.
©Feb. 23/20
Picture via Pinterest

Expunged Love

Eyes
bruised grey
hair lank
dead
detached
when…..
who….. 
what….. 
is coming for me?
Nowhere to run.
I wait.
Heartbeat count
fevered brow to pane
it has been ordained
they will collect me.
I care not.
Frost.
Black heart
wreathed
iced
encased
fingers etched glacier blue
cold.
Throw the bitch a bone
I heard your guttural voice
Nothing more
Nothing less
She deserves…..
I forgot your twisted side.
I forgot your hate.
I forgot just what it meant to be
the one who jilted the King.
©Feb. 22/20
Picture via Pinterst

Word of the Day Challenge #88-Untitled Poem

Stark
grey
black
stretched against nothing
hanging
convicted of crimes
though never charged
cronies love him so.
Shake with one hand
stab with the other
Julius Caeser
he is not…..
although
assassination at cohorts hands
not so unimagined.
Fears
doors locked
barred
danger roams the streets
ravages the night
no one held responsible
for reprehensible acts.
Tyranny…..
Justice…..
rise of one
death of the other
vultures gather round
tearing flesh
rending reality
bending it to their will.
For those with eyes
witness they bear
as History arises once more.
©Feb. 21/20
Picture is my own

I Am…..

Lost in thought
dreams
slightly out of reach
gazing sightless
upon the things I wish……
time has come
let go of fairy tales
grow up
be responsible
voices crowing
deep inside
but 
whines the little girl
I do not want to let go
grow up
become boring
oh no!
Grow I did
put aside
childish fantasies
dolls a plenty
straighten the collar
romance
dead in the air…..
Time came
(with age comes wisdom
ha ha)
I realized
I knew
my dreams
more important than air
gasping
driven
starved
my creativity
reared
breaking free
from studded cell
admonishing me.
Awaken
my muse
or am I the conduit
for her? him? them?
I let fly
I let free
reign true
rule fair
I am a poet…..
I am a story teller…..
I am…..
whatever my imagination says I am.
©Feb. 20/20
Picture is my own

Death’s Desire

The masks I wear
Beneath a face
None see
None realize
Is yet another masque
Fear
Ruler of this domain
Laughter maniacal
Sending chills
Down my back
Birthing
Insanity
Clutching at the bars
The door lockless
Handleless
No escape
Only hell beneath my feet
It is not easy
Day after day
To play this person I am not
Assuring all
Never again will I fall
Never again will I fail
Yet knowing
There is no net beneath my feet
No current upon which to rise
Blood let
Seeps red crimson
Pain is gone
For me at least
Yours is just beginning.

I am sorry

©Feb. 19/20
Picture is my own