Mishandle

Have you witnessed?

Have you heard the words

rolling from his tongue?

Chanting

pontificating

orating

while all stand

mouths agape.

Holy roller

shaking

convulsing

the spirits entering

as he mishandles

the snakes.

Shaking with mirth

(stunned at the audacity)

tears fall as humor is found

(fear and pain intertwined)

the testimony of a clown

(how did it come to this?)

hell bent on destroying

(reimagining a plutocratic society)

all that democracy has built.

 

Photo by Craig Whitehead on Unsplash

 

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Rending

Locked in my mind
vicious voice
rending my soul
my belief
in self.
Denouncing the strength
the knowledge
riding over affirmations
burying them in the cemetary dark.
I am lost
I am tired
I am afraid
to look down this road once more.
My knees shatter
I offer up beseechment
leave me alone this time
I won’t fight the next.
Thick mimosia
clinging
wrapping
entangling
knock me from my feet
blood flows
tears collapse
as I shudder beneath.
You silly bitch
hissing voices scream
you have no control 
you have no ability
to rid yourself of me.
©Jay-lyn Doerksen
July 18/18

Soulless

Look into the maw
gleaming blackness
shrouding your fear.
See the ghost gliding
walking forward
silent feet.
Faces flash
one after the other
nightmares of your past.
Open your mouth to scream
to denounce the burden
when it jumps.
On your back
blinking
the ghost
nay a demon true
hunkers on your chest
and inhales.
Long deep breath
feel a shifting
a tear at your heart.
Lone crystal
trickles down curved cheek
as the soulless
devours your soul
alive for a brief moment
leaving you dead within.
Jay-lyn Doerksen
July 10/18

Serenity

Like a small child

hunkered down

hiding

dreading the blow to come

so do you

make yourself so big

so boistrous

that all are distracted by the gloss.

The pains are less

washed down with spirits

with tainted love

drowning in disbelief

how did it come to this?

Within

I see the potential

I see the man you could rise to be

if only….

you gave yourself a chance

if only….

you realized happiness could be ours

if only…..

you could see yourself

through my eyes.

Understanding gained

pain released

hold me close

never let go

your serenity I will always be.

 

 

Never Fear

Yawning abyss
toes curled at the edge
staring downwards
can I fly?
Will my dreams hold me?
I leap
over the precipice
feeling the current
soar beneath my wings
I glide forth
my heart touched soft
knowing you are near.
Swooping
diving
catch me in your arms
show me I have nothing to fear
for you are not the callous one
but a lover dear.
Downward spiral
wings wrapped around
holding me safe
snapping upright
into the breeze
flying high above
but cradling me near.
One two
you will never let go
you want to show your worth.
Three four
beats on the floor
dancing
around and around.
Darling of mine
shine baby shine
never more
will you fear the morrow
for I shall always be at your side.
©Jay-lyn Doerksen
July 10/18
.

Nothingness

Tears seep
tracing the curve of my cheek
trailing
salty kisses on my lips
pondering
why I feel this way?
Nothing wrong
no sense of impending doom
imagination
spiraling out of control
when I know
I may have pushed too far?
Overstepping
infamous for I am
reading too much
into too little
building my fairy tales
only to knock them down.
Self destruction.
I am not crazy.
I am not insane
even though I portray myself this way.
Easier to hide
behind a sinister mask
than brimming with bright smiles
allowing the hurt
to become a dull throb
one I cannot placate.
Never crumble
never fall
ideas ingrained in my mind
not worth it
undeserving
voices playing over and over again.
Happiness
ever fleeting
skims through my life
touching lightly
only to bounce off
leaving me bereft
clutching at faded memories
of time we spent.
Hopelessness
sadness
raging pain
loss
fear
the emotions I live with
every day.
Does it get better?
Does it ever end?
This feeling of……
nothingness.
©Jay-lyn Doerkson
July 8/18

Protection

The mighty oak

tall

straight

reaching for sunny skies

never changing

never bending

always a beacon for the storm.

The gentle willlow

sweeping the ground

supple

lissome

bending

as the storm rages on.

I have the strength

the determination of an oak

to withstand pain

to stand tall

facing the storm

as I am pelted with rain and hail.

Twist and turn

accept

know

that despite my strength

I need to bend

like the willow

to protect myself

to keep safe

this heart

that I am holding out to you.

 

Photo by Alex Iby on Unsplash