Lost

It pains me to say this.
It pains me…..to admit this…..
I miss you.
I miss waking in the middle of the night
your arms around me
holding me tight
chasing away the nightmares
the monsters 
that rip through my heart.
Demons
dancing through the glades
tripping through the tulips
raping
destroying
plunder
all that is mine.
Glass shards
dig into my knees
platitudes I mouth
forgiveness I need
penitent I am…..
my fault
my passion
my need…..
to…..
make you feel?
Never did I feel safer
than awakening
held in your arms
pulled close
fear chased.
I need you.
I am sorry
I cannot leave you be.
Tears
leak from the corners of my eyes
blurred vision
what is it
about you
about me
that we cannot let go.
Oh wait
maybe it is me who cannot let go
maybe I am the stalker
you the deer.
I do not know. 
I am afraid I am the freak
that you
the one who fears
what I might do.
Blade drawn
macabre smile
twists my face
must accept darlin’
you have lost…..
we are lost…..
April 3/19
Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Author: Jay-lyn Doerksen

A single hard working mom of a soon to be teenage son. A poet and story teller I have wanted to write since I was a child. This space is where I share stories about myself and my life and the creative poetry that stirs my soul. My hope is you will pull up a chair and a cup of coffee delving into the world that I offer and you find simple enjoyment for a few moments. Welcome to The Wonderful & Wacky World of One Single Mom

49 thoughts on “Lost”

      1. Don’t cry!! Look on the bright side! You have an entire weekend coming up where you’re supposedly going to chat all over me like wallpaper!

        Wallpaper… we’re so outdated…

        Liked by 1 person

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