Powerless No More

We sat beneath summer skies

relaxed

when you began to spin.

I was not open enough.

I only gave hints

otherwise

I hid it all away.

My past is ugly

my scars

braided across my wrist

soul hammered

beaten

cross to bear

but you promised.

‘Talk to me.

Tell me true.

I swear to you…..

I will not leave…..

I will not let you down

like others before me.

I opened up

telling you the horrors

the fears

the pain

how everyone always walk away.

You vowed you were not the same.

I was a fool.

I believed your pretty words.

I should have known…..

When it sounds too good to be true…..

it is too good to be true.

You duped me.

You pulled me in.

You are a fucking ass.

Yet under my skin

you remain

an ache that won’t subside.

Some days I still love you.

Other days I hate.

Satin tears

drowning my cheeks

you call me a fool

a puppy

a sulking bitch

how could I do this to you?

How could I do what?

Feel?

Open?

Believe the words you have spoken?

Shred my heart

stomp on my reserves

this baby girl

is no longer on her knees.

I am taking my power back.

January 19/19

Photo by Josh Rocklage on Unsplash